discoriggall

a musical news

2009-09-08T21:40:00.002+01:00

Earbound in recent times:

UK Man thinks it's 1950

2009-08-25T21:17:00.002+01:00

Link

.... Who on "the left" thinks Stalin was OK?

Mob Deep

2009-08-24T19:55:00.004+01:00

So, some US bloggers are trying to start a boycott of Scotland for releasing a man in his last few weeks of death I see. How forgiving of them! And the head of the FBI, writing an open letter to the world, criticising a sovereign coutries internal politics. How diplomatic.

Terrorism is wrong, killing people is wrong.. obviously. But compassion is always a good thing and we should be proud when it is shown even to murderers. Now, this "hero's welcome" in Libya isn't a great thing, but then lots of people are over-proud nationalist dicks: I notice they've popped out of the woodwork in a few countries regarding this story.

I really hope that the internet isn't representative. I like to think that the kind of people who get so worked up they have to complain are probably not normal. But they are noisy!

"The sort of justice that favours the mass murderer above the victims families is sick, sick, sick.

Can't wait until we can vote all these filthy cowardly politicians out of office.
We need proper justice in this country again."

I think I know what "proper justice" means. Angry, retributional mob justice that pleases the bloodthirsty. We don't need to be like that, the middle ages were a long time ago and we are supposed to be better now. The rightious right are a funny lot - I thought they were supposed to be God fearing Christians, but they seem to believe in the barbaric values that their saviour, a Mr Jesus, definitely argued repeatedly against. There is no "except terrorists" in his philosphy of how we should act. It's one of they few things I like about any religion.

So, angry mob, please fuck off and grow up.

in case you missed it

2009-06-14T20:59:00.002+01:00

(the original) post rock plus architecture. what more could you need?

outrun

2009-04-25T10:52:00.002+01:00

trouble is, from wot I get from the nooz, the tide in Britain is going against sensible, and the people want to copy most of yurp and get a (n even more) right wing government. What a load of idiots. And as it seems to be becoming a foregone conclusion, I don't see the point in fighting it.

The media's language discussing all important issues is more or less obsolete (if you think media has a useful role to play in the world). When even the Guardian reports a 50% high tax rate as "hitting the rich", well, that's a "sign". A sign that everone's screwed. I agree with the Telegraph that we shoutn't target the rich with high taxes, but disagree with the rest of their ideas. We shouldn't target rich people: we should lock them up and torture them until they agree to pay some taxes. (while there are really poor people around, however hard (cough) you work in a bank it's not fair to be filthy stinking rich).

Luckily, a guy called Mark Pritchard has released a song called "question mark", and it's really good - difficult to find online, or anywhere though. He was half of Global Communications, The Jedi Knights (till george lucas got all legal on their asses), and more recently was Harmonic 33 and Harmonic 313. All good.

Fashion Special

2009-03-27T16:29:00.008+01:00

For reasons I won't go into, I went to H&M, TopMan and Zara this week. What's going on there?

So, this is a color pallete from Zara, and all the others are doing the same. Horrible. They're colours that say "I'm not very confident about being this colour". Which is the right thing to say when you are such a disgusting colour. H&M are doing jeans in that blue, which should be a criminal offence.
Anyway, items two and three are from perennial style offenders TopMan (like TopCat, but shit). We'll start with this collection of printed Ts, which scream "I AM A MORON" more than anything I've seen in recent years:

If you're thinking about wearing them, remember these are the kind of things that terrorists rightly hate us for, so do yourself and everyone else a favour, and blow yourself up somewhere quiet.
And lastly:

Checked shirt and red braces? Are they taking the piss?

I would use bigger candles

2009-03-23T11:19:00.002+01:00

See, when you do your own cooking, things get a whole lot healthier. Incredible. If you're really pushed for time, instead of using apple pie filling in the centre, use cat food. That way you get two courses in one, and you won't have two sets of plates to clean afterwards.

Modern Drugs are Rubbish

2009-02-24T22:40:00.005+01:00

"The emphasis is on the thrill of the moment, the buzz of rescuing the princess in the game. No care is given for the princess herself, for the content or for any long-term significance, because there is none."

- Once you've felt the buzz of rescuing the princess it's like there's nothing else, man, you just wanna rescue the princess over and over again. Soon, I was stealing and begging on the street, just so I could rescue the princess and feel that high again. -

...Lady Greenfield continues her intelligent analysis of modern technological stuff by saying, 'perhaps the next generation will define themselves by the responses of others.'
Now, that would be a change, wouldn't it? Because, as social creatures humans have absolutely never defined themselves by the responses of others, have they? Oh, no, ha. Wait a minute, they almost entirely have. I know some of us like to try not to, too much, but that's not the point. What is Lady Greenfield on about?

I'm off to inject some Facebook and smoke a Twitter

in progress

2009-02-15T23:08:00.000+01:00

yeah, hip daddy cool

2009-02-11T00:24:00.003+01:00

I don't know much about Seth Reznik, except what I read in his Guardian bio. So, I know as well as writing digital zeitgeisty piffle occasionally, he used to work for an organisation called "Americans Coming Together", which is a liberal activist group. Yeah, right. Sounds a bit TOO liberal for me, and I really don't see why Americans should have to do that together at all.
Hilarity aside, Seth writes a piece about how Obama has called on a Huffington Post (or HuffPoo, as people call it) journalist, and how this really shows how blogs are changing the landscape.
"Politicians – and the media – can no longer rely on the media to define what is important. A whole range of actors now decide, not least the consumers of news themselves. The command and control grid of media management is out. Authenticity is in."
Authenticity WHAT? Huffpoo is just a bunch of journalists writing boring crap - what could be more media than that? The website looks pretty media-y to me. In terms of a media revolution, it's a bit like saying "hey, we're gonna fight a war, but we're going to use GUNS".
What is it with authenticity anyway? I'm lost! So, Because this is a blog, is what I'm writing more real? Is it gooder because I can just make up whatever I want without the interference of anyone professional or anyone to sheck my typling? Because libel means nothing here, I can be realer than real - it's my truth and I'll tell it if I want to, even if it's wrong, even if it's idiotic. It's my truth, it's the realierest, truthiest thing in the world. Paris Hilton has four bottoms! There I said it. Really real. Authen-fucking-ticity city here we come, baby.

I created this show!

2009-02-11T00:01:00.003+01:00

Noel "Mr sweaters" Edmonds has gone on an amusing rant against some council that won't let an injured war veteran build whatever bungalow he wants wherever he wants BECAUSE HE'S A VETERAN. Y'know? We have to respect our war veterans by LETTING THEM DO WHATEVER THE FUCK THEY WANT. Especially if they don't have legs, then we should respect them more, and actively help them do do whatever they want because they were in a war, and did I mention they have no legs? Here's that video.
And that video led me to this one:
I didn't watch it all (I'm not insane), but really enjoyed the idea that if you've got any bassoons or 'cellos, send them in to this charity...
Why did someone let silly gameshow host Noel Edmonds do a telly box programme where he can shout his gob hole off about issues he, as a silly gameshow host, know's frankly fuck all about? I need a right wing knee-jerk reaction coated with a bloated sense of self importance! Quick, get Noel on the phone and tell him the council's planning to round up and shoot war veterans while dancing on the Queen mum's grave! What do you say Noel?

late night hype

2009-02-01T23:19:00.000+01:00

Discoproportionality

2009-02-01T16:39:00.004+01:00

The Israeli Prime Minister, Ek Ekekekek, wants the world to know that if you're a dick and try to attack Israel, he will be a disproportionately large dick in response. Recent actions prove he and his government are certainly some of the biggest dicks on the planet.

Don't get confused and think I'm trying to say Israeli politicians are hung like donkeys - what I'm saying is "look at them, what a bunch of massive cocks".

I might try to remember Ek Ekekekekek's name properly when he stops acting in such a toweringly phallic way. I'm not even sure why he feels the need to tell the world something we already know - that he's a cock - and it would be much more instructive for us were he to tell us why he's such a dick.

Maybe he gets sexually aroused by the idea of 'accidentally' bombing hospitals?

I don't know, but considering how much of a dick he is I can only assume the worst.

Gravity Bone

2009-01-23T19:16:00.004+01:00

Loathe as I am to mix work and this (there'll be no link to my professional opinion for sure), I can't not mention Gravity Bone. It's a 20 odd minute art-game for PCs, and it's one of the coolest pieces of videogame culture I've ever seen. It's unusual, funny, enigmatic and has a great ending. The instructions are in-game and make playing no trouble. Sno excuses.

The joys of horribly pretentious writing are being celebrated once more in the anals (sic) of Pitchforkmedia.com. This review... gahhh!

party like it's 1991

2009-01-16T22:58:00.006+01:00

Dj Shadow, in his wisdom released a bunch of old good stuff, limited edition, through his website, and I missed it all. The internet's a mo-fo, tho, and minimal searching will cough up the downloadable goods. (for example)

I wouldn't be that bothered about a bunch of old unreleased stuff, as there's usually a good reason for stuff to be unreleased. This is pretty cool though - the KMEL mixes made when he was 19 are ace: The mixing is fantastic and exciting, the hiphop's great and the second has a little interview with him, which is pretty rare in itself. Of the original and remixed bits, they're interesting even if they don't all work.

Something that reminded me a little of Shadow, recently was Mophono, although he seems to be more about reworking tracks than making new ones, his stuff is nice. The Edge remix is great, and although to be honest the original is fantastic too, I have enough experience to recognise it's hard to remix a great track without making it worse.

All this made me go searching for more stuff of this ilk, but all I found was stuff that was pretty regressive. For a once future obsessed genre, the turntable-as-instrument crowd seem to have lost their course somewhat... I read about then listened to an Austrian group called Phonsapiens, but it was just dull, and they were the best of my discoveries. Damn.

Talking of Damn, what the hell are Google up to? That new icon makes me sick.

baby birds are called...

2009-01-16T14:20:00.001+01:00

browse like it's 1985

2009-01-15T17:06:00.009+01:00

This was the first computer we had at home. It was colour! Green! Unlike later computers, this was quite difficult to get used to, as all the controls were from the keyboard. Using it efficiently required memorising a lot of commands. It worked, but wasn't exactly user friendly.
So what a relief, you can imagine, when computers came with mice. All of a sudden everthing was easy, and the whole experience better.

Lots of people - like me - work all day on computers, and we think we're great and know all the shortcuts and hot keys that speed up work. Some people think the coolest thing would be to control everthing from the keyboard, as it would combine not having to move you arm, speed, and an air of superiority that IT snobs love. Some idiot has tried to do this, with "Mouseless Browsing", an extension for Firefox that's pretty self explanatory.

Some sites I won't mention have praised this as a great tool, speeding up efficiency and finally freeing IT folk from the labours of having to push a mouse around. I am not in this club. Do I control + t for a new tab, yes. Do I want to type control + 125 to open a link on a page. No. A mouse click or track pad tap will do fine, and won't necessitate having web pages covered in numbers.

Mouseless Browsing is a horrible combination of geeky inaccessibility and ugliness. I remember old computers. They were a marvel at the time, but I would never want to go back. And I wouldn't want websites to look like this:

fuzzy list

2008-12-31T11:27:00.009+01:00

I could write a top ten albums of the year, but that's a bit samey, so instead here's a more porous, honest this year - last year - next year list of music. I do this as, I'm not some kind of monster who hears everything the moment it exists, so there are things from the past I miss that are good. Conversely, I am the kind of monster who hears the things the rest of the world will be catching up with after I'm long since bored of them (I'm afraid that moment is when the Gruaniad writes about it - the easy way to tell when something is sooo over!).

1: If you don't agree that Flying Lotus released the best album this year, what are you, some kind of fan of other kinds of music? That makes me sick. This record manages to mix invention, artistry and accessibility better than any other I've heard. Usual caveat applies that it's not pop music, but as long as your ears are a bit open, this collection of noise is sure to please.

2: I went on about Mr James Pants a lot this year - three things you should hear are his Stones Throw podcast, 'Music From The Forest', album 'Welcome', and mix 'Ice Castles...'. I guess he's a bit more of a niche artist, but it's my niche so all good.

3: I only heard this project this week, but it's got the mark of undeniable cool about it: Chico Mann, a side project from a member of Antibalas. I think Chico Mann's fusion of afrobeat, latin funk, electronics and funk in general could be the new sound... I suspect however that some gits at Pitchfork will decide the new sound is four boys with guitars whining about how unelievably shit they are. Watch out for Chico Mann, though.

4: I got into Sally Shapiro late, but their 'Disco Romance' album was a fantastic piece of nostalgic electronic noise.. it sounds exactly like the title too.

5: The Menehan Street Band released an album of realy nice instrumental funk grooves...

6: All the electronic pop/rock fashionable stuff deserves a mention 'cause I did enjoy it, though I think that aesthetic's probably been done enough now - so Cut Copy, Midnight Juggernauts and The Presets, your Australian onslaught has been fun, but I'll be surprised if it happens again. 'Road to Recovery' by the Juggernauts was the best of the lot, for what it's worth.

7: My nomination for record noone else does care about and is unlikely to goes to Morgan Geist for his very stylish detroit-style album 'Double Night Time'. I seem to be programmed to like certain coldish techno noises, so I was well pleased with this.

8: Actually from Detroit, hiphop from Black Milk, with some nice rough yet tight production. Miles away from chilled out hip hop, without the rubbishness of pop-level hip hop.. I found 'Tronic' a breath of fresh air. I hope 2009 brings more stuff from him.

9: I also mentioned Q-Tip quite a bit. His new record really is worth it though.

10: Doing to 'indie' what Outkast did to hiphop about a decade ago (it's a much more progressve genre don't you know), Of Montreal's release this year, 'Skeletal Lamping', again proved most people with guitars are sitting on their laurals, and that for a song to be good it should have about a thousand different ideas in it. Crazy, but nice.

hmmm. That'll do.

Except, I was gonna leave the annual 'let's brutalize the Palastinians at Christmas' thing Israel is doing, and I will, just point to Dallas Penn, who did a good piece about it..

NY2LA

2008-11-29T20:00:00.005+01:00

I finally got myself out record shopping, to pick up a couple of not hot off the press albums yesterday. Luckily they were worthwhile purchases, as secondary target of "buy some trainers" totally flopped. This seasons' trainers SUCK (and the ones that don't weren't in my size, damnit). Here I am not rocking my new trainers that I don't have 'cause trainer designers are kinda wack.

But the music... I happened across the new People Under The Stairs record, FUN DMC. Their first record, ten years ago, was one of my favourite underground hiphop albums at the time, and apparently this is their sixth. I think I have four. Anyway, this is the best put together album by the LA duo since back then. They may be misguided putting so much effort into making a record flow, as we're told the kids don't listen to albums these days. They should; this is cool. It's one of those hiphop records that bumps along nicely, with the odd song that makes you think, 'this is what it's all about'. PUTS have been making ears feel good for a decade, and they deserve more recognition.

I also got NYC by another duo, kinda, Kieran Hebden and Steve Reid. I have their first collaboration from a couple of years ago, and that is the most challenging record I own. Even by crazy jazz standards, that is HARD. This new one sees them sounding much more like music, and really starting to achieve what you'd hope such talented artists might. It's not exactly Britney`, and won't be setting dance floors alight*, but it's an excellent piece of experimental electronic jazz.

*dancefloors are full of people who like to move to mostly crap, that's why
`obviously I don't listen to Britney

Last Chapter?

2008-11-18T21:07:00.003+01:00

"Obama vows 'new chapter' on climate change at Schwarzenegger summit."
I hope it's, "...and we all woke up to find it was all a dream, and Hummers were the only way to save the environment, which didn't need saving at all, because actually everything was just fine. The end."

Sushi

2008-11-15T20:19:00.001+01:00

Crazy, but niiiice.

Krapwerk

2008-11-14T20:39:00.005+01:00

Modern technology has now got so good, you can use your mobile phone to create an electronic group like Kraftwerk, but a million times worse.

What an age we're living in.

Did I mention Q-Tip recently? Well, I've heard the album, 'Renaissance', now, in fact it's been on almost constant rotation for the last couple of weeks. Fantastic, really. If Kanye West's new art-pop-wack album outsells Q-Tip, all the good done by Barack Obama's election will have been for nought.

The response of Republicans to their crushing loss has been sometimes embarrassing, sometimes funny ("They're jerks"). If you can bear to read it, here's a link to one time hard man turned Conservative lunatic Chuck Norris's recent 'Letter to the President Elect'.

In it, Chuck, magnanimously, realises 'that (he and Obama) must learn to work together if (they) are to see (their) country get back on track'... but then counter-realises (ahem) that ACTUALLY the President works for the people, therefore to gain the people's respect he must do exactly what conservatives, like Chuck, want.

Because winning a landslide election does not mean you have the will of the people behind you - to get that you have to do what your opposition wants! Congratulations, Chucky, on some interesting reasoning.

Unfortunately for Mr Obama, that will mean taking on board some of the Christian right's political wishes, which include;
1. Shooting gays,
2. Bringing about the End Of Days,
3. Invading all brown countries,
4. Worshipping Jesus, while, 5. Trampling the poor, 6. Being selfish, 7. Eating puppies, 7. Raping the earth's resources, 8. Using prostitutes and 9. Hard drugs, 10. Encouraging HIV in Africa, 11. Blaming the 'liberal media' for everything, and 12. Hating anyone who seems to have a happy, relaxed sex life. Ooh, and 13. Eating kittens and 14. Baby pandas too.

ps; I realise I've posted less over the last few weeks; that's because although I kind of wanted to, I couldn't be arsed.

Holy Crap!

2008-11-07T20:13:00.002+01:00

Just when you thought Barack Obama being elected would stop the crazy right from being funny, here's the ever hilarious Conservapedia on the President-elect himself....

"Barack Hussein Obama II (born in Honolulu,[1][2] August 4, 1961) is the Democratic junior Senator from Illinois (2004 - present) and President-elect of the United States.[3] On November 4, Obama and his running mate Senator Joseph Biden won the presidency after spending a record-shattering $650 million, much of which may have been from foreign sources.[4] Obama will likely become the first Muslim to be sworn in as President, on January 20, 2009, and could select the Koran for this purpose."(LINK)

Erm... Would anyone like to see my monkey impression?

I didn't get where I am today by voting Republican.

2008-11-04T23:29:00.001+01:00

Don't make me angry, America!

I am in the studio with all our hangs

2008-10-24T17:11:00.005+01:00

Said Bai Ling recently. I am equally unenlightened.
Anywhoo, the internet's a big ol'thing, and one has to be very careful how one approaches it.
Take Kira Cochrane, and her article in the Guardian entitled, 'Fair game?'. In it, she asks why there hasn't 'been a bigger backlash against the misogyny aimed at Sarah Palin.'
Well, that would be fair question, were it a fair question. But it's not. Kira gives us examples of a sexist youtube video, and a blogger. Now, you can find anything you want on the internet, so if you want to find something made or written by a chauvanistic moron, you've come to the right place.
The reason there hasn't been a backlash against this kind of misogyny is because that would require mainstream widespread misogyny. If the BBC and Fox News were broadcasting chauvanistically about Sarah Palin, I'm sure there'd be a backlash, but fighting moronic rubbish on the internet is just pissing in the wind, and I guess most people realise that.
Anyway, who is this Kira Cochrane to talk about chauvanism? All she ever writes about is women, women, dieting, women, male cyclist's thighs, women... hardly balanced, is it?

Obviously, I think nothing about Sarah Palin's sex makes her more or less able to be US VP. It's her rabid, ill-thought-out, and pig-ignorant views, coupled with her overwhelming stupidity that make her a bad prospect. Am I a thick-ist? Yes.

good question

2008-10-16T17:53:00.004+01:00

I wonder whether all this capitalist soul searching will actually result in some tempering of the system or not. There's no historical (in my lifetime!) precedent for any action, and while things may look bad, the people who gain the most from the markets etc would have the most to lose from reform. These people being the rich and powerful of the world, makes me think they're more likely to try to weather the storm until it's business as usual again.

I can't see the rest of us taking to the streets and brandishing pitchforks or anything, so my guess is we're not really seeing the end of Thatcher's capitalism at all.

Still, it's nice to dream (but it's not enough).

move

2008-10-14T22:50:00.003+01:00

so, for the second time this year, I believe, I'm going to relentlessly plug shit I dig...

This time it's Q-Tip. His new video/song is just fantastic; the production is a masterclass in how to be popularist while being a bit clever too, and the rhyme has the correct amount of aggression in it. All good. I hope he conquers the world. I've read his album is released either on the 4th or 11th of November, and so far I'm even more excited about this than I was about James Pants earlier this year.

Republican voters may be stupid

2008-10-12T17:52:00.004+01:00

Now, obviously, what she thinks about abortion is wrong, but what shocks me about this is the fact the crowd cheer almost every other word. What scares me is that people in the apparently civilised world can still behave like idiotic Shakespearean mobs.

More republican mobs here, with McCain actually being decent in front of his rabid, frothing ill informed crowd.

"He's an Arab"!!! Aaaarggh!

fuck bankers

2008-10-10T08:13:00.004+01:00

Last month I read an article describing the slow/reverse progress being made towards the UN's "Millenium Goals" (like halving world hunger by 2015).

When I say slow, I mean, there has been slow progress in China and around Latin America, and it is the governments of those areas that can be thanked for that. When I say reverse, I mean sub-suharan Africa, where things are getting worse. Remember all the Western leaders bleating about hunger in Africa? Well they haven't payed up enough to help sort out the problem.

One organisation says the world as a whole needs to spend an extra £7 billion to meet the hunger target alone. I know, £7 billion. Fuck, man, that's a lot.

So, when I read last night that the IMF (Imbecilic Money Fuckers) is preparing a $200 billion fund to help stricken economies, I was a bit surprised. Apparently, as they haven't been lending recently (probably because developing countries have started to realise what an utter shower of shits the IMF are and how they don't want to be screwed over for a generation), they have somewhat of a "war chest". Bastards.

Ditto "the fed", the treasury/Bank of England etc etc etc. What is going on? Where is all this money coming from? We are constantly told government spending has to be cut back on anything social, and yet as soon as the gits in suits fuck everything up with their idiotic dealings, there are hundreds of billions of pounds, euros and (ha) dollars (not that they're much use) to deal with the problem.

If it was that easy to chuck billions about, why do we still have any starvation in the world? That, I realise, sounds like something a Miss World contestant would say, but how else can you put it? It obviously is possibly to find these kind of funds, and all of a sudden I see it's quite acceptable to nationalise industries to protect them from the brutal swings of the markets - so let's get to it. And someone find £7bn to chuck at world hunger... or more if that's what it takes.

On another note, I love avclub.com. Here are two celebrity stories to give you nightmares: Brangelina, awfulness. Can we put Kanye to bed now?

they're gay.

2008-10-07T11:03:00.003+01:00

Well, quite.

At the other end of the nonsense scale, yesterday in the Guardian we had Germaine Greer, and she done this:

"Freedom's just another word for nothin' left to lose... This has always struck me as one of the cleverest lines ever to turn up in a pop lyric. I first heard it one night in December 1968, when Lou Reed took me down to a club in Greenwich Village to hear a new singer called Kris Kristofferson. After we heard the set, we went back to Max's restaurant and I didn't actually meet Kristofferson until nearly three years later, when I came upon him crawling through the dog-flap at Janis Joplin's house, not long after her death, and just before her version of his song Me and Bobby McGee became a huge hit."

When I am King, there will be a moratorium on 60s anecdotes. When the 60s "revolutionaries" can explain to me why exactly they all grew up to ruin everything with the worst excesses of the 80s, it will be removed.

The legacy of 68 isn't freedom, or hippies or civil rights, or the sexual revolution (because no-one had sex prior to that?).... It's wankers in suits, Porsches, big phones, crappy music, rampant capitalism, shallow "spiritualism". I could go on. I've recently come to accept the 60s were a good time for music - lots of things happened in a short time, it was very forward looking. I can dig that. What I can't dig is the tower of pretentious, tuneless, meaningless, musically backward looking shit that is and was Bob Dylan. He learned from Kerouac that if you're shambling enough, wordy enough and massage people's "intellectual" egos enough, people will buy into you wholesale; you don't have to say anything worthwhile. Music with meaning? Dylan's having a laugh - listen to Public Enemy.

Anyway, she finishes her article on a flourish... "Freedom cannot be built, but it can be sung."

What?!? You get PAID to write that? Still, like

oh no! bad energy!

2008-10-02T20:21:00.002+01:00

I came across a facebook group called "The Mission : Clearing of concentration camps --> Clean up after the Nazis".
I couldn't think of any possible way that could be a good thing, so I checked it out.

It is unbelievable nonsense. "The Secret" is remarkably sensible compared to this...

Read it for yourself, it's enlightening in all the wrong ways. It's a shame that people with good intentions can be so dim-witted... Here it is.

Holy hand grenades!!

how the internet improves political debate

2008-10-02T18:56:00.003+01:00

(from youtube)

metaphor of the day

2008-10-01T16:40:00.002+01:00

Republican representative Darrell Issa (?), explaining why he would not vote for the (failed) bill to bail out the financial sector, said it would put an end to the Reagan era, that it would,

"permanently put a a coffin on top of the coffin of Ronald Reagan."

Pow! Take that!

As Colbert pointed out - a coffin on top of a coffin? That is twice as dead.

Anyone reading this who has not been clicking on The Colbert Report link daily, should start right now! And watch the Daily Show too; that's 40 odd minutes of satire four days a week! What are you waiting for?

discoriggall

2008-09-30T23:11:00.002+01:00

cool toys and thoughts

2008-09-30T09:49:00.004+01:00

I read about this some months ago, and it seems it is finally close to being released in Europe (though I can find no dates). It's the Korg DS-10, which turns the lovely Nintendo DS into a clone of Korg's 1978 classic MS-10 synth (with extra functions).

Apparently the sound production is good, and it comes with a sequencer too... very exciting. (if making analogue techno is exciting :)
There are also rumours Nintendo is planning to release a third generation of DS, with an added camera and music player. Hmmm, yes, well. I doubt it will have the chunky charm of the first one, but perhaps I'm just bitter!

Elsewhere, I read a nice little article about f**4ng censorship by Philip Pullman, whose "Dark Materials" trilogy I have not read because I Am An Adult. The first of those books was one of the most complained about to the "American Library Association" last year.
Having heard Republicans worrying that letting government save their crumbling economy is "the slippery slope to socialism", I am surprised they have libraries in the USA, much more so than I am that some idiots might have complained about a book.
Anyway, back to the point, Pullman says a couple of nice things that I shall reproduce below.

"My basic objection to religion is not that it isn't true; I like plenty of things that aren't true. It's that religion grants its adherents malign, intoxicating and morally corrosive sensations. Destroying intellectual freedom is always evil, but only religion makes doing evil feel quite so good."

"...this kind of thing only invites the rest of the world to consider the American public demented."

awkward interview...

2008-09-26T16:54:00.002+01:00

This is what an exposing interview should look like...

I don't know many people with THAT little knowledge of politics, and it's apparently her job. Still, I love it when a campaign starts falling to pieces...

Also, in international Birmingham news, is this lovely Partridge-like clip from the BBC.

Ouch.

I'm PC

2008-09-22T16:08:00.003+01:00

I saw this ad at the hater... And I agree with Amelie's sentiment. "This makes you want to buy a computer how?"

Now, I'm all for statements like "I'm a PC and I sell fish", because they're silly and meaningless, but I'm not sure how it helps Microsoft.
Bill Gates: "I'm a PC, and I wear glasses"
...SO? And to the people after him who also wear glasses.. well done! What does that mean!?
But here's where the Microsoft marketing train really derails, and it's probably because they are unaware we are not all Americans: Deepak "philosophy for morons" Chopra.
Rule of thumb - whatever he likes, you hate. The man is a plankton, and those who drink up his vapid life philosophies need to check their heads (or read some real philosophy).
So Deepak is a PC? Bye-bye Microsoft!

(ok, I have a mac, but my feelings would be the same were that not the case)

excursions

2008-09-21T15:25:00.007+01:00

No one fashionable is going to care about this (though they might have an opinion about the clothes in the video), but Q-Tip, once of A Tribe Called Quest, has a new single out and it's NICE. To these ears it sounds fresh, but I suspect it lacks all the bells, whistles and general wackness that the kids require of "hiphop" these days. Damn kids!

Don't know why it's taken eight years for him to recover from not having his second solo album released...

I'm trying not to go on about economic woes and the increasing nonsense that is the US electoral campaign, and diving back into hiphop is always the best way for me to switch off. That's due to me being from the streets (of a small town in the midlands). Chea!

My favourite internets discovery lately, and it's hiphop related, is "the internets celebrities". This duo plus camera person make little humourous video "essays about social justice, food, and free shit." Real life in NYC; very comparable to life in a small town in the midlands. Don't watch if you don't like swearing, but if you do, there's some surprisingly poignant shit right there.

One of the two sites related to this, ohword.com, has a fantastic deconstruction of the beats behind Nas' Illmatic. If you don't know what that is, it's widely considered to be the greatest hiphop album of all time, and that's not an opinion too wide of the mark. It's better than the Beatles, the Stones and Elvis put together times INFINITY. For people who think hiphop is "not music" or "not art", spend half an hour listening to and reading this blog post, and have your eyes and ears opened, and your opinions changed. The part about the song "represent", produced by DJ Premier (who's never put a beat wrong in his life, as long as you forget that song he did for Christina Aguilera), is particularly surprising... but read it all!

arty games

2008-09-18T22:41:00.011+01:00

Naomi Alderman, in the Guardian,has been discussing whether video games should or might be considered "art"... She makes some interesting points (although I refuse to consider Myst as art; it was just dull).
But, she seems to think games should have "easy" settings so they can be accessible to all, and that this would allow games to truly be considered art. Now that is a terribly 90s way of thinking: art should be accessible.
Why?
Much of "high culture" is certainly not accessible, you need to spend time in a medium to learn to appreciate much of it. In some cases, it's almost necessary to be educated about a work of art before you can appreciate it. Of course, this isn't true of all art, but accessibility is not everything.

Ergo, if games are too hard for you to appreciate properly... PRACTICE! One of my favourite games, Yoshi's Island, I think could easily be defined as a work of art, and it is certainly one of the best examples of a certain type of game. To fully enjoy and appreciate that, do you know how many times I "died"? How many times my fingers failed leaving my lizard friend plummeting to his doom? That's part of the experience.
It may be that other art forms do not rely on giving you some kind of direct challenge to see them fully, but that's part and parcel of what a game is. What's the point if you can't lose?

There are games which seem to be looking for an "art" tag, REZ springs to mind, but they are often laboured and not great experiences as games. I really wanted to like REZ, but like many a beautifully designed bar, it's looks are accompanied by average techno, which kind of spoils the experience. Had the sonics been as cool(and techno CAN be cool) as the aesthetics, I'd be claiming that as "art" too.

In music news, music definitely can not consider itself art until we can distinguish music like the new Fujiya and Miyagi album (probably art) from things like the upcoming Britney comeback album (definitely not art, probably shit). They can't BOTH be music... Oh, and so the news was there's a new Fujiya and Miyagi album and it's pretty good if you like knowing krautrocky stuff...

oh dear

2008-09-18T22:41:00.010+01:00

"The collapse of Lehman Brothers cost him his first job before he even saw his desk, but Edouard d'Archimbaud, the 24-year-old Parisian who travelled to London from France before learning his fate, has not lost faith in the financial system." (link)

Apparently, 'Edouard d'Archimbaud says his Lehman colleagues laughed when he arrived'... I'm trying to put my finger on what it is that makes me entirely unsympathetic...

blink!

2008-09-17T17:44:00.002+01:00

I don't usually aggree with the formula camcorder+pets+youtube=FUN!, but occasionally there are exceptions...

It reminds me of the far too scary angels from Doctor Who..

...I couldn't find a great video of that, my apologies, but it brings us nicely to the other issue of blinking...

As they say, posts full of videos SUCK!

Shmeenius

2008-09-12T13:03:00.009+01:00

altered beast by vessels

Fandalism Free MP3 Hosting

I once lived in a town where there was a shop called "Chic".
Needless to say, the contents of said shop were about as far from Chic as you could imagine. So it is with a degree of trepidation that I have agreed to let Apple have my iTunes library history, to allow iTunes 8.0 to make use of the new "Genius" feature.

"Genius is a fantastic new way to discover music with iTunes. Genius makes playlists from songs in your library that go great together with just one click", so say Apple.

I like making playlists; I "DJ" to myself all the time - but I'm no genius! I wonder if iTunes Genius can compete?

...The information gathering process is taking a while, and my macbook is all-fans-blaring. I don't think that setting my knees on fire is the sort of thing a Genius should do, so things had better improve fast...
The mac goes quiet, the silence only increasing my nervous apprehension... and I'm in! Information gathered and spewed out, all I have to do is select a track, click the Genius button, and I'll be in playlist heaven.

I chose "Black Butter, Past" by The Strawberry Alarm Clock, a sixties record I've been enjoying recently. Oh dear. Genius doesn't know about that song. Does Genius only know songs in the iTunes store?
So I proceed with a Barry White song, and we're off. Firstly, I discover that I have a song called "in those jeans" by Ginuwine in my library, which would be embarrassing if anyone else saw. Genius, eh? Think it's cool to embarrass me in public, punk?
Otherwise, it's fairly unimaginative. It's as if I told it "I want 25 songs excusively by black soul singers please".
Which I didn't.
Same happens with a hiphop track - "What up man" by The Cool Kids - I'm given a "genius" tracklist of 25 hiphop tracks. Not even the best hiphop I have either - it just looks like a random collection to me.
Cool electro chimps "Crystal Castles"? What do you know, I get a playlist of electronic tracks.
Of Montreal? A playlist ripped from the heart of an anal Pitchforkmedia reviewer (who is right to point out I'm the one who has this music in the first place).

How is this "Genius"?

More fun is to be had by challenging it. Now, no reason for anyone to ask what I'm doing with any Kate Bush music at all, but for reasons you'll never know, and I'll never tell, I have some. OK? Ok, this, bizarrely, is much better. I get a list including Hot Chip, Joy Division, a bit of Michael Jackson, Queens of the Stone Age, Fugazi and the Pet Shop Boys. That's a challenging set right there.

I assume, were I to own much more MOR 80s glossy rubbish, Ms Bush would have elicited a ton of that - but in the absence of natural soul mates, the Genius system seems to have gone crazy (which is quite charming). I am not making this up, but following the Kate Bush track, Genius, in some unfathomably genuis-like way, making a decision that is beyond mere mortal understanding, chose "Jesus Built My Hotrod" by industrial metal act Ministry.

I can conceive of a playlist that included both songs, but I think you need a few more tracks in between to make it work... However, like I said I'm not a genius. iTunes 8.0, so it says on the box, is.

update....

Charles Arthur in the Guardian thinks "Genius" could be worth 8.4 BILLION dollars, but I wouldn't pay that much, as the iTunes store library is not comprehensive, and the tool itself is too simplistic. Still, I am not most people: I'm sure most people will love having iTunes mix up playlists of their Coldplay, U2 and Keene (s)hits, as most people are probably too rubbish to do it themselves.

Also ...ask her about Dinosaurs!

erm

2008-09-10T22:16:00.002+01:00

on a meta note, "blogging" has apparently become quite influential in UK politics (I'm sure in other countries too), and frankly I think it's a bad thing...

...because the most "influential" blogs are right wing.

Now, me not being right wing, you'd expect me not to be totally happy with that, but I think I have real cause for concern:

The daddy of political bloggers is some mook calling itself "Giudo Fawkes"(no link, you'll see why). It makes no bones about being anti Labour, and is full of some extremely unfunny right wing jokes (is there any other kind?), and snide comment. So far so "why is this shit so popular?", but hey, interestingly, from that blog you're only TWO CLICKS from hardcore English racist nationalists (through its blogroll and beyond).

How many clicks am I away from these plankton? Loads. Because I'm a long fucking way from being a nationalist, xenophobic, little ingerlander pissbag. These "influential" right wing blogs keep company with the scum of civilisation; someone in the media should start ignoring their mindless bullshit.

public git repositories, an appeal

2008-09-10T10:57:00.004+01:00

This is real (www.github.com), though cursory glances around the site reveal it not to be about gits at all, which is disappointing.
Has the word "git" become so unfashionable, noone remembers what it means anymore? Look at the bottom of my page, you'll see the phrase "gitsurfing". Does noone realise what that means today?

Still, "public git repositories" is one of the best phrases I've heard for ages. Here's a preliminary list of such repositories:

Eton,
X-Factor,
Big Brother,
The Daily Mail offices,
Manchester United (actually an overpaid git repository),
The London Stock Exchange,
The British Homeopathic Association,

I'll leave it there for now, but I welcome contributions. My aim, one day, is to have the most comprehensive directory of public git repositories on the web.

New Knees!! Wooooo!!

2008-09-08T11:08:00.004+01:00

Ok, Sarah Palin has exploded on to the American political scene, and I saw her speech last week. It was entirely lacking in substance, but full of cuddly soundbites.
She seems popular - but wait! Just because she's a woman and a mother doesn't mean she's not dangerously insane!

As far as I'm aware, even Dubya Bush isn't that mental. It's frightening.
I don't want to even go near people who believe "this world is not for me, I will follow you," as they sing. They want to take us to the apocalypse, and people who believe in that should not be put in a church, but in an institution.
The stuff about blessed cell phones is hard to think about. "There seems to be a special cell phone annointing"... "there's been a dead person raised, there's been a woman with new knees".
New Knees!! AAAAAAARRRRRGH! Praise the lord, though the dead person having been raised is probably more interesting.

I want to go to Alaska, and I want to know exactly how it is people like this exist in the 21st century. Their beliefs are so far removed from mine, it's incomprehensible.
She seems to believe that god wants gas pipes built across Alaska, her son is going to Iraq on a mission from God, and I see that of course she'll believe in the creation story. From what I see, the attraction of this church is that you say "I love Jesus" a lot, and then whatever you want to do is "part of God's plan".
The pastor there says "this is awesome", but he's wrong, this is NOT awesome, this is fucked up.
In this extended video, the pastor explains how he believes Alaska is a "refuge state" for people of the other 48 when "the end of days" comes.
What has to happen to the wonderful piece of evolved technology that is the human mind for it to come to conclusions like that?

The pastor should in any case be wary of what God does, as sometime He does stuff just to fuck with our heads - as He did when he hid fossils everwhere to test our faith (Bill Hicks). Perhaps Alaska being a refuge is just another one of God's jokes. Hopefully these extreme Christians are also one of His Divine Amusements, and not really dangerous people at all.

Anyway, back to this dead person being raised....

tragedy

2008-09-03T13:46:00.001+01:00

No excuses for being Conservative, fat people insist as they launch new deal on public mentality

2008-08-27T11:19:00.003+01:00

"Tory people will today be told there are "no excuses" for being "conservative" as the Fat party launches a new "responsibility" deal on public thinking.

The shadow health secretary, Andrew Lansley, will use a speech to the thinktank Reform, entitled No Excuses, No Nannying, to set out proposals on how the government and business can work together to address problems caused by poor reading, drug abuse and lack of compassion for our fellow men.

"Tell people that biology and the environment cause Conservatism and they are offered the one thing we have to avoid: an excuse," he will say.

"As it is, people who see more Tory people around them may themselves be more likely to be arseholes. Young people who think many of their friends hate immigrants are likely to do so themselves. Girls who think their peers engage in sneering at the poor are more likely to do so themselves.

"Peer pressure and social norms are powerful influences on behaviour and they are classic excuses."

Vowing to "take away the excuses", Lansley will unveil proposals for the party's second "responsibility" deal with business.

He will ask a new working group to consider:

· supporting EU-wide proposals for mandatory Conservative culling

· asking the food industry to poison Waitrose ready meals

· a clampdown on the Daily Mail

· using role models and positive peer pressure to promote healthy thinking

· local campaigns to promote nice, open and healthy thoughts.

He will float the idea of incentives for small businesses to improve the philosophies of employees. "We will take action to ensure people have the opportunities, information and incentives towards not being pricks," Lansley will say.

The speech comes after the Tory leader, David Cameron, said last month that Tory, stupid and right wing people spent too much time blaming social problems for their own idiocy.

link

summermixtape

2008-08-21T17:28:00.005+01:00

well, nothing of note to say, but I'm posting some music, if you're interested.
Just a mix of what I'm into right about now... For example;

Eine Kleine Nacht Musik, you just might like, if you like your music Krautrock style (like fujiya and miyagi). There's a bit of 60s psychedelic pop, as a few weeks ago I was bored with new music, briefly, and needed something to fill a hole. David Axelrod pops in too, also from the sixties, with music "inspired by William Blake", and not many people say that kind of thing anymore. Some quiet noise from something I know very little about called "Tape", and a track by Quiet Village, whose album is much better than the horrible opening track suggests.
Back into the 70s for some Rufus and Chaka, and the Spinners too. Mmmmm. Smooth. And, as they say, much much more!!
That's not in the right order, and you'll have to wait for the link as rapidshare is being a mo-fo - I am on my third attempt at uploading, without it deciding it's been "interrupted", now. Grrrr.
Oh, and, irritatingly, I've mucked aboout with all the ID3 tags, so they'll play in the right order (ie the order I intended) in itunes, but things like last.wewishwehadn'tredesignedoursite.fm might complain....

mixtape link

substantially worse

2008-08-16T10:27:00.003+01:00

I can't remember the ins and outs of "The Age Of Reason" by Sartre, but I do remember that I am the same age as the central character now - so I must have reached it. Did Sartre mention that there comes an age where the repetitious nature of the world starts to become bizarre and surreal, though in a horrific way? Is there a word for that feeling? I could perhaps reread Sartre to find out, but this is the internet, and we don't have enough time for proper research. It's all just rant rant rant I'm right 'ere innit?

Well, the Georgia situation put me in that frame of mind. The war itself, the idiotic political responses, the childish simplistic news stories (which "the media" will soon realise are so - before forgetting it just in time for the next conflict). If it wasn't for all the people dying, it would be funny. Is there a word for that? It pains me to think about it too much, as I feel I've thought about stuff like this many times before, and the same mistakes are still made - there's proof of the non-power of thought - but I'll try briefly:

Mikheil Saakashvili, the Georgian President, is a plonker. Attacking Russia? Is he mental? If Georgians wish to know why they're being bombed - the can look to their numbnutted leader.

Now, I can never remember Mikheil Saakashvili's name (ctrl-v!), so I just looked at the Guardian's world news page to copy it from, and wouldn't you know, here are journalists coming to the conclusion they've been seeing things simplistically!

"Saakashvili might have lost the war against Russia, but, scant consolation perhaps, he is widely seen to have won the propaganda battle. Big bad Russia against plucky little Georgia. Accurate or nonsense, thanks to "Misha's" Brussels-based PR men, it is the picture that's dominating the world media." (link)

Damn PR men - they get us every time! Grrrr! How do they do it?

I'd like to think the Guardian are the only people in the world surprised at their own gullibility, but I suspect they're not. Still, as the news media weren't doing their job reporting the news properly, I don't have to feel bad about name-checking Sartre without really remembering what I'm going on about. Shame I'm not getting paid for doing my job badly like they are, mind.

If yer bored, or need to relax, listen to "MARK WATSON MAKES THE WORLD SUBSTANTIALLY BETTER" through the Radio 4 website.

more... booze

2008-08-06T21:29:00.002+01:00

Now, if it was Madonna releasing a remix version of a "classic Madonna album", it would be terrible. A Bad Idea. Of course, this is all hypothetical, and not possible in this universe, as she has no classic albums. Don't argue.
Madlib and MF DOOM, joining forces to become "Madvillain" did produce a classic album, four years ago, and the follow up is much anticipated.

In the meantime, producer Madlib has remixed the original, which is a bit like hot-washing the Turin Shroud. You just don't touch these things....

But what little I've heard, it's just fantastic. Re-visiting Doom's intelligent twisting delivery with fresh beats underneath is great. I read the review in Bitchfork, and they were not impressed, but then they like Kanye West, so they definitely don't know what they are on about (in other rap reviews, they appear too dim to decode simple Nas lyrics): and when you like Kanye, you out yourself as someone who really doesn't know jack about good beats (or sunglasses).
So ignore them; listen to meeeeeeee.

Knol isn't knowledge

2008-08-03T15:45:00.004+01:00

Google, in their oh so friendly mission to take over the internet (and then... the World hahahahhaha) have released "knol.google.com", an attempt to compete with Wikipedia. The articles are written by one named author, and it's not a free for all in terms of contribution.

Also, it's remarkably dull. Here's the entry on "Heartnuts"

"What is a Heartnut?

Heartnuts are a cultivar of the Japanese walnut. They open into two flat heart-shaped halves, like a locket. Heartnuts thrive in the cool northern climates, so you will most likely find heartnuts growing in northern states, Canada and Europe.

Nuts are currently on the diet culture list of good-for-you foods and heartnuts have been shown to be a healthy nut [1]— high in fiber, antioxidants, and protein. The taste is sweet, mild and pleasing. A wonderful nut for cooking and baking, it is especially flavorful toasted."

Fascinating.

The author is described thusly (?)...

"She first saw heartnuts at the Pennsylvania Farm Show in the produce awards area. It was love at first sight! She planted her own seedlings and grafts, located nurseries in the U.S. and Canada that sold nuts as well as tree stock, and has been crafting and cooking with them ever since."

It's a shame we don't know when this was. Last week? 40 years ago? I'm (not) wondering exactly how much you can do with this nut, which, I learn, when toasted has, "a flavor I can only describe as incredible."

Oh, can you Susan? And here, I believe, is the rub.

While we may need our knowledge of heartnuts and 3D fitness expanding through the medium of Google, whatever is wrong with Wikipedia, unlike Knol it doesn't read like second rate lifestyle magazine opinion. Because Google, in huge error, have in replacing multi-authorship with named single authorship, created a huge waste of space. A ton of not "authoritative articles", but gooey personal opinion free of moderating peer review.

Even better, many of the authors are directly connected to industry - so "geneology" is written by some git who runs a family tree website. I read with trepidation hoping that he would actually be so crass as to recommend using his own fucking site, and of course he did! What a nob.
Google, now a huge corporation, look like a bunch of dimwit mugs for creating such a stinking pile of cheap ass corporate amateurism.

So to "the internet" in general, stop worshipping at the altar of Google, they are not infallible, they got here by luck, maintained market position with an ad system that frankly does its best to ruin user experience, and now even though knowledge is apparently their stock in trade they are actively trying to ruin that too.

Knol, a unit of knowledge?

Reality, Media haven't met in years

2008-07-28T17:36:00.005+01:00

If you read the newspapers, you might conclude that when walking the streets of England you'll be stabbed to death by drunken youths on every street corner.
Britain is in the grip of a "Knife Epidemic", apparently - although if you stop being stabbed for a minute and look at the figures, crime is dropping, including stabbing all over the country. Last year there was no epidemic, this year, with less stabbing, we have an epidemic.
What's behind this?
Today, the "superpoke" application on Facebook has come under fire for having a "shank" your friend option (to shank is to stab, I discover). Not actually shank your friend, but send a "virtual" shank. It's not particularly big or clever, but the response is most definitely neither.
"..the CEO or directors of Facebook should be arrested for inciting violence." Rages uncle of stab victim.
Incidentally, when you need a balanced reasonable point of view, as a journalist, the only responsible thing to do is ask someone wracked with grief and anger over the loss of a loved one. They will almost without exception (if you find said exception, find someone else) rage blindly about retribution and revenge. Being a relative of a victim makes you an expert on the causes of the crime to which your relative was a victim. No?
Er, no, but protocol is protocol, and the above uncle rages as he is expected to. I took that quote from the Daily Hate Black People, which also printed this picture:

I don't need to explain that do I?

Anyway, Facebook apparently 'are targeting the kids who are on street corners carrying knives.'
'Why the hell would a social networking site for teenagers put something like this forward?' froths Mr Knox, showing a remarkable lack of knowledge about social networking and how facebook works.
Why the hell indeed, and I don't know. Something else I don't know, is reading Mr Knox's comments, he obviously doesn't really know what he's on about, so how does he know about it at all?

Could it be shit stirring social panic arsonist journalists at The Bum? Could it? They write like monkeys, too, but it's potent material in the hands of their (VERY SORRY) idiot readers who can't reason. Just juxtapose "stupid internet game" with "KNIFE VICTIM!!" enough and the link will form, even if the two things are not causally linked.
Remember, knife crime has fallen, not risen.

I was reading about the Gin epidemic, which really was an epidemic, and found this quote, 'The campaign against gin presented a simple solution to the problem of poverty: gin by itself was responsible for the poor health and poor behavior of its users. People were poor and destitute because they drank gin and not the other way around.' Social moralisers often present links back to front or upside down, either through stupidity or malice. Why whipping up public concern over knife crime is necessary I don't know, but the reporters and editors involved must know they are creating a phantom menace, and also that the cure from social problems is never as simple as they make out.
So, banning facebook will have an effect on knife crime? Of course not.
The gin epidemic in Britain in the 18th century looks like the binge drinking "epidemic" in Britain today, too. Both occurred in a time where there were huge wealth gaps in society, combined with cheap alcohol; but none of the morally outraged of the past or today will champion the abolition of wealth gaps as a cure for society's ills, either because it's complicated, or the outraged person in question is rich.

ooh look at me I live abroad and it's so weird

2008-07-23T16:15:00.006+01:00

and I'm so much cooler than you, I'm going to make you jealous of my lifestyle, safe in the knowledge you won't actually check up on it.
Because I'm a journalist, and the first rule of journalisticalism is; if in doubt exaggerate, or just make it up.
Have been discussing this phenomenon with a friend of mine, using two articles as examples - the first, an oldie but baddie from The Daily Posh Mail (ie Telegraph) from '04, and one from today in The Guardian.
In the Telegraph, your heroic correspondent reports taunting Spanish youths who had been shouting abuse at him, "(adding) a new phrase to their English vocabulary and (going) on my way." This, my contact in La Linea assures me, would be a remarkably stupid, and probably hospital-visit-inducing thing to do. I think what actually happened was, he had abuse hurled at him, and he walked, or ran, away.
Now to the Guardian, where finding illegal nightspots is like a game of cat and mouse, and you have to "hope that the police have not got there first to shut them down." Sounds fucking awesome and dangerous, doesn't it? Sorry.
You don't have to worry about the police, because they VERY rarely do anthing about such places. And finding these bars is just like a game of cat and mouse - one where the mouse has been in the same place FOR YEARS and everyone knows it.
But that wouldn't make such a good story...
Now, I admit, the ones I've seen, some are pretty cute, or pretty cool, but what I did not find myself thinking while there was "what this place needs is a load more English people acting like total gits." I mean, what is the point of a clandestine bar, once some fucknut has printed its address in a fucking national newspaper?
Joder.

Neon

2008-07-22T13:52:00.002+01:00

On Saturday I was at Summercase in Barcelona; Mogwai good, CSS good...
But I was most taken by Neon Neon, who've written a musical biography of John DeLorean, which, weirdly, is good.
It was a bit messy live, but ver engaging, and guest star "Har Mar Superstar" was fantastic, especially for people who like over-sexed pot bellied mullet haired Americans...
And today they've released a two-part video for "I told her on Alderaan/Trick for treat". Nice.

expertise

2008-07-21T16:29:00.002+01:00

Perhaps I shouldn't have been reading anything on SkyNews.com, but I was... reading about the upcoming facebook redesign. I wonder if it will cause as much upset as Last.fm?
Anyway, I made a discovery...

"Facebook expert Tony Beresford said that the site's revamp was a positive move."

Facebook expert? The ability of people to be full of shit impresses me. How far can one get in life making claims like "I am a facebook expert"? I don't have the nerve to make meaningless statements like that - ergo I am not on SkyNews.
Facebook expert is not quite "medical expert"; though I suppose there's not explicit qualification for either, I bet it's pretty easy to be a Facebook expert. I mean, I probably am. In fact, and I'm sticking my neck out here, I bet this Tony Beresford knows nothing more than your average person.

So we are all experts.

...Unless we write for SkyNews, in which case we are either gullible idiots or agents of the advertising industry. Another story on there relates a story about a "perfect woman robot" who cooks and cleans and will be on sale soon. Now, that idea is clearly nonsense, but they run with it anyway - a little, and I mean little - research shows this to be a crappy French advert for Nivea for Men, at "perfectwoman.com". Idiots for even considering this, and punch in the face for marketing people again for being facile.

Life is a game

2008-07-16T07:50:00.011+01:00

....of Tomb Raider!

yourgamebaby by playing

Fandalism Free MP3 Hosting

"Until you have cleared level one, which I have incidentally never done, you cannot get on to level two. Level one is: are you a reasonable, decent, non-discriminating, sensible, practical person who understands the world as it is lived today, who wants to live in a modern world and who accepts what that means? If so, then you can move on to level two, where you can talk about some of the difficult issues about families and about responsibilities which can lead to trouble." (link)

So David Cameron, chubby cheese-faced leader of the government in waiting UK Conservative Party, describes modernising tory politics, through the wonderful metaphor of Lara Croft. In fact, they are similar, as they both remind me of arse.

Obviously he's confused, level one is: you are an underdressed woman who needs to learn a variety of acrobatic moves and to handle weaponry. Once learned, you can move on to level two, where you can roam caves and ruins, leaping from ledge to ledge, shooting blood sucking bats, and a variety of other supernatural animals. Just like in Buckinghamshire.

What pisses me off about this Etonian gitmunch is he seems to be presenting our problems as being solely our fault, but then blames someone else. Like, inequality is our fault? Well, no, it's the fault of black absent fathers (I am paraphrasing his arguement, obviously). So, once they take responsibility for da kidz innit, everthing will be wonderful.

This, presented as "responsible, mature" politics is working like a dream, as the mass of middle class voters feel good that they at last can address the "difficult" issue of why the poor are such a bunch of laybout irresponsible violent irks - while not having to address why their own BMW driving public schooling 4 holiday-a-year lifestyle and fuck everyone else 'especially next door who are a right load of you know whats' and the rest of the planet attitude is ruining everything.... (breath).

So thanks, David, for being such a dickbag.

Perhaps voting Tory will be like playing Resident Evil for the first time: You learn what to do, then get eaten to death by crazed zombies (is there any other kind?). We can only hope it will be thus.

!! Logic Update !!
Level one is "are you a reasonable, decent, non-discriminating, sensible, practical person who understands the world as it is lived today, who wants to live in a modern world and who accepts what that means?" You have to achieve this to proceed to level two, which, as Cameron says, "I have incidentally never done."
Ha!

monome

2008-07-14T22:47:00.003+01:00

so, with minimalist research needed, this is the box thing Daedelus was playing at Sonar...

and here's an example of Daedelus using it...

how to upset nu-nerds

2008-07-11T12:57:00.007+01:00

iphone launch not going to plan.
Aww diddums! The uber-trendy geeks are upset about waiting a few hours to get their ikkle wellyphones.
"Londonruss" cries "this should go down in corporate history as a lesson in how NOT to manage a product launch." Boohoohoo. The tech-geeks should communicate more - what about the launch of the Wii, the PS3, Windows Vista, etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc? Yawn.

Still, on the bright side, Israel and Iran seem to be careering towards armageddon, and the US wants to help, so who knows, the availablility or not of iphones might be a moot point. Still, ooh I can't buy my iphone boohoohoo.

An igeek, earlier.

Oh, and also...

No.

and I don't even like him

2008-07-09T11:18:00.004+01:00

This year, at Primavera Sound I saw some of Rufus Wainwright's performance, and I was surprised not to find myself bored, as it's really not my sort of thing at all.
Today I read a review of another of his concerts, in the Guardian (!), and did it make me angry?
The review is largely positive, but climaxes saying, "...after a while you long for a tune you can hum."
Yeah, you might do, if you're a superficial mook who can't go ten minutes without a Britney song. God I hate people who say stuff like that "ooh there's no tune nyurr nyuurr nyurr". Mabe there's not supposed to be? If you need tunes you can hum, perhaps you're better off locked indoors listening to Radio 1 all day, not straying out to see artists who deviate from top-ten style garbage. Don't you think?
I might actually punch someone if they started humming next to me at a concert, so watch out. Not that I go to many concerts with tunes you can hum (unless you're VERY musical like me).

in hiding

2008-07-08T14:41:00.004+01:00

The usually tea and cake, village fete world of the Anglican Church has been upset reently by the threat of "schism". A schism between the "reformist" liberal end of the spectrum and the "traditionalist" wanker end. Am I being a little harsh on the poor traditionalists? I rather think not, children.
I'm not being unfair, because traditionalists are lying to people about why they feel the way they do. They say that women and homosexual (let's leave homosexual women for now) Bishops go "against scripture" and so cannot be permissable within the Anglican Church.
Were that particularly true, they might have a bit of an arguement, albeit a crap one, but it's dimwitted of them to call on "scripture" as if it is written in stone (it's paper, even I can see that) - as it was written by men, translated, re-written, changed re-translated and so on and so forth over many centuries. In such cases, claiming something is "unchangeable" seems an arbitrary choice at best, and completely wrong otherwise.
But I digress, for a change. I said they were lying! And they are, as all this "scripture" stuff is nonsense - the traditionalists are hiding behind it. The truth is they are bigots. They are sexist and homophobic, and use anything they can find to hide this, as even traditionalists (I mean bigots!) are aware that saying,
"I oppose women Bishops becasue women are inferior and I hate gays too", is abhorrent.

It's what they think, though. So perhaps we shouldn't hide behind diplomatic language like traditionalists? Just call them prejudiced fuckers instead.

Just so I don't have to repeat my ass in the future, many nationalists use patriotism and culture to hide their racism. Watch 'em!

To change the mind of a bigot, you're asking them to eat a lot of humble pie, which is never easy, so bearing that in mind, here's an olive branch. I hate the NME and everything it stands for, according to me, and yet I discover they have championed the following band, so they can't be all that bad after all.
Here is "Dungen"

pantscript: I -finally- have James Pants' album "Welcome", and it lives up to my high expectations, so is fantastic. Pitchfork gave it a 5/10 review, but that's because they are an "indie" website, and "indie" is inherently conservative and snooty. A record that can't easily be put into a genre box makes indie-folk nervous; the lack of rules and boundaries result in pant-wetting. They fear free music!

syntax era

2008-07-04T11:54:00.003+01:00

For a while now I've been getting email newsletters from an organisation called "Human Events", who claim to have been "leading the conservative movement since 1944". It's American, and if you don't know who contributors Ann "Bitch" Coulter and Bill O'Reilly are, I leave you to do your homework. After all, you're already on the internet!
Anyway, here are some quotes...

"The United States is only one liberal Supreme Court justice away from being judicially transformed into France."
Cheese eaters!

"Educators at every level have sought to keep students from being exposed to any mention of America’s gun heritage."
School is so DUMB!

“natural rights” of the sort protected in the Bill of Rights should to be referred to as “absolute rights.”....natural rights (are) given us by God, our Creator, and as such, (are) completely and utterly unassailable by manmade governments."
God wrote the constitution! HE wants Americans to carry guns! But not the French!

"McCain has ...embraced every crackpot liberal idea, including the left's latest plan to exterminate the human race, called "global warming."
It's a LIE we'll be FINE, just carry on as you WERE!

"You can't eat your way out of being hungry!" "You can't water your way out of drought!" "You can't sleep your way out of tiredness!" "You can't drink yourself out of dehydration!"
We are unbelievably stupid! (I admit to taking this one totally out of context)

But they ARE unbelievably, and yet cynically and willfully stupid. Conservatives are either stupid or purposefuly misleading, ie evil.
Stupid, Horrendous, Idiotic and Terribly Evil.

In other apocalyptic news, in response to recent stories about Billy Ray Cyrus's daughter, who is apparenty famous in America, and the fact her new video is in all the viral video charts, I subjected myself to this three minutes:

Now, the stress of that has given me more grey hairs, but through the pain it occurs to me the message of this song, aimed at impressionable young girls, is "Girls are rubbish, and need boys even if they are shit." As someone else wrote about something else; "This is why terrorists hate America."

half baked

2008-06-24T18:28:00.007+01:00

A mayonnaise advert by bean company Heinz, in the UK, has been cancelled (bean cancelled?), or pulled, due to complaints about its contents. Apparently it featured men kissing in it. Wooo. Scary.
And, I read this in the Guardian this piece, where the author claims Heinz has insulted gay consumers by removing the advert. It hasn't insulted gay consumers, it has insulted society as a whole.
A small group of retarded bigots who should be forcibly reeducated or sent to Australia should not be allowed to have such an.. what am I saying? It's an advert, I don't give a shit.

I was going to download, listen to, and review the new Coldplay album, to amuse myself, but I'll skip that and get to the conclusion: You can get better free and legally free music, and you should. There is no need or justification in today's world to subject your psyche to empty whiny rubbish like Coldplay; people buy it because they're too lazy to find something actually good. I'm too lazy to actually listen to the rubbish most people are lazily listening to: but that makes me a better(lazy) person.

blaggers

2008-06-22T20:10:00.005+01:00

I was at Sonar day, Friday and Saturday, and saw some good stuff, though maybe not quite as good as last year. Not weird enough!

However, there were some cool things, like Daedelus, who was pretty intense and was playing a strange touch-sensitive box I've never seen with considerable flair. Whatever it is, it looks great, I want one. On Saturday there was some cool weird Japanese stuff - I was feeling a little odd at the time (hangover plus 38degrees doesn't agree with me at all) so don't remember the names. One particular artist was creating music with 80s computers, very much in the stle of 80s computer games, but gone mental. Very cool, and the video montage took me back to the world of the Commodore 64, so I was feeling a bit nostalgic.
I was also feeling a bit light headed.

So, there was some other stuff too, like a Swedish electronic group reminiscent of Hot Chip, but shit. Shit Chip, if you will.
Most enjoyable, though I'm afraid I can't recommend them, were "The Duloks", a purposefully bad girl group -from London?- who are very funny. I think the between song banter was better than the songs, but whatever, it was a welcome break from over-serious electronica.

Well, it was fun. But I couldn't help noticing that MOST people there seemd to be there with press/photo passes, or under various other "for work" guises. Can't be that many people who actually pay for their own tickets. And a lot of people who can do their jobs drunk/on "illegal high drugs". Which is nice.

Now I'm watching Spain vs Italy, where it appears Berlusconi has bought the referee.
(photo from here)

it's been a long time...

2008-06-18T19:21:00.004+01:00

..over a year, in fact, since I paid a visit to the wonderful world of "Conservapedia".
Last time, you may remember, we discovered how the dinosaurs co-existed with humanity, and were saved along with the rest of the animal kingdom by Noah and his big fuck-off boat.
Today, we will visit the altogether darker world that is Atheism.

Atheists are terrible people, I've learnt: They are more likely to commit suicide, mass murder, be insane and be communists (or anti-American).

But worst(best) of all, Atheists, "look upon the following behaviors as morally acceptable: illegal drug use; excessive drinking; sexual relationships outside of marriage; abortion; cohabitating with someone of opposite sex outside of marriage; obscene language; gambling; pornography and obscene sexual behavior; and engaging in homosexuality/bisexuality."

Incidentally, while we're talking about "the Gays", "Given the many diseases associated with homosexuality, the Bible prohibition against homosexuality is quite arguably one of the many examples where the Bible exhibited knowledge that was ahead of its time." See?

Oh. Jesus, it goes on... We come to "reasonable explanations for Atheism."
Before we look at this, do bear in mind these are REASONABLE explanations, okay? I will cherry pick, which is another thing I probably do due to my;
1: "Moral depravity: Moral depravity has been demonstrated in the atheist community through history and through studies."
2: "Superficiality."
3: "Error."
and, of course,
4: "Poor relationship with father: Some argue that a troubled/non-existent relationship with a father may influence one towards holding the position of atheism."
In addition, they are "all intelligent and arrogant."

Well children, your host is retiring for today - I have lots of illegal drugs/abortion/sexual depravity to attend to. Perhaps next time we can read Conservapedia's balanced discussion of Global Warming or Gun Control....

PS. "Anti-Americanism is the prevailing disease of intellectuals today." I thought it was Atheism.

bankers

2008-06-16T20:14:00.004+01:00

So lorry drivers are striking again, or where they are not, they're threatening to. It's easy to pass them off as an unpleasant bunch who use their strategic position to make economies suffer, but it's wrong.
They may not even realise it, but they are an illustration of how free market economics has led us towards ever more untenable positions of inequality. I hope they are the first of many groups to protest, as I believe protest is necessary to reorder economic interests in Europe to more democratic ends.

What am I on about? The liberalisation of labour markets possibly helped bring about
the long period of growth and prosperity throughout the 1990s, but while everyone was doing okay, we didn't notice how much better those at the top were doing.
Apparently the average Shell driver salary is THE SAME as it was in 1992, after which Shell contracted out all of its transport (to cut costs). So while the drivers have been stagnating, Shell has been realising record profits.

Simultaneously, top level salaries have been increasing at much faster rates than middle and lower ones across economies. Why? Because people at the top can do it, not because of market pressure. Now unions are more or less neutered, there is no democratic, only financial, power in the labour market. This needs to be redressed.
I would not call for complete economic equality, but it is certainly wrong that the well off should be getting richer quicker than those less well off. Rates of wealth growth should be higher in the poorest - we should be working towards equality, not inequality.

But there is no pressure to do this, which is why protest is necessary. I would even go as far as to argue we should raise import taxes, to protect European industries (while supporting the right of other nations to do the same); this would be a way of protecting higher salaries from cheap competition (or exploitative competition form China, for example. If you think that's rude, do you want to work 14 hour days for a couple of dollars?)

The world of high finance and "big money" has had free reign to make the world as it wishes for almost 30 years now. It has not been a success. Most growth has benefited the most wealthy in the world, while the rest have seen their wealth grow modestly, not at all, or actually shrink, while government safety nets have been dismantled.
Larry Elliot, economics editor of the Guardian, has written a number of good articles about the need to regulate finance; here is one
The populations of Europe and the US should take back democratic control of the economy, and force responsible and fair practice on those industries that have shown themselves willfully inept at regulating themselves. It is time we stopped living in societies where one person earns the salary of 400 others: no-one can work that hard, no-one is worth so much. Especially not while other people live in poverty.
It is perverse.

Ruth Kelly Not Guilty

2008-06-13T21:12:00.002+01:00

Apparently, R. Kelly has been found not guilty on 14 charges of 14 counts of child pornography.
They should have charged him with being shit, that would´ve stuck.

Ruth Kelly is probably guilty of something, though (definitely of philosophical naivety).

terrorist fist jab!

2008-06-12T22:27:00.002+01:00

sorry you have to endure ads.

difficult position

2008-06-12T15:49:00.002+01:00

The Conservative shadow home secretary, David Davis has resigned as an MP, in protest over the vote to extend detention of suspected terrorists to 42 days (without charges), and the introduction of ID cards.
Huffffff. I'm not sure how much of a stunt this may be, but he is correct to protest about this, and the "relentless erosion of freedoms" by the incumbent government - much as it pains me to say so.
I do not understand why Labour has persisted with these Orwellian policies, which are neither necessary nor popular. I think they've gone mad with power - which means they must be thrown out at the next election.
Which is a difficult position to be in, because we do not need a Conservative government, either. Perhaps the Liberal Democrats can reinvigorate themselves into the right sort of organisation to be electable, though I doubt it with Mr Nobody Clunk as leader. We're doomed!
...Well, as long as I live in "socialist paradise" (elsewhere), I'm not; but I want good governance for Britain too.

A new party, that's what's needed, and fast.

(that's when I reach for)

2008-06-08T09:32:00.002+01:00

I've just read another article about FIA head honcho Max Mosley, you know; the nazi prostitute sex video guy. Now, I do have to admit that story was quite funny; I enjoy seeing the rich and powerful exposed as being wierdos, but there's a limit to what these discoveries mean.

Yes, he's bizarre, and unpleasantly so, but he does it in private, so I'm afraid it doesn't affect his job (incidentally, what DO presidents of these bodies do? My guess is drink a lot of champagne and fuck about at parties...). So, Catherine Bennett, who must have ran out of things with which to fill her column (me too!), points out that one the one hand he has been exposed as a "prize jackass"* yet doesn't feel that's a problem, while "only recently" he fined a Formula 1 team for "bringing the sport into disrepute". But I don't get the comparison - the F1 team was acting in an unsporting manner during a race - Mosley was acting in a freaky way in private. So what?

Interesting family, Mr Mosley comes from.

Mosley's dad, Oswald Mosley, was the leading British fascist during the 1930s, and allegedly had his car turned over by my granddad and friends. His political movement was doomed primarily because the majority of British people resented his policy that everyone had to wear brown - the 1930s had been depressing enough already.

*"Prize jackass"? Which century are we living in? I can only imagine posh yahoos guffawing at cocktail parties in stately homes saying "prize jackass" - probably just before the "nazi prostitutes" arrive. Most aristocrats use nazi prostitutes at parties - FACT.

In other news, I see the government is threatening to close failing schools in the UK. I thought that sounded a bit counter-intuitive, 'cause how will closing a school help its pupils? Then I read on, and understood: "Once the plans have been submitted the schools will have less than three years to transform or face being closed down, merged or turned into privately run academies."

So, Ed Balls (real name!), Secretary of State for Children, Schools, Families and Being a Fucknut - you motherfucker. This government has a few fetishes, and one is that private companies will somehow run organisations better than public ones. They don't, they just make more money out of them, and education in Britain is SUPPOSED to be public. And this is a "left wing" government! Jesus Christ! This point is one I might return to....

Watch a video!

scrrrrrrape.

2008-06-04T19:57:00.004+01:00

Art in Britain is very often smug and narcissistic, being personality led, rather than art-led. Demian Hirst's agent is even happy for him to be described as a brand - how arty is that?
Although I understand artists using assistants, some brit-artists take the piss - Hirst, again, now only comes up with crass ideas, which other people execute for him.
Which I must emphasise IS RUBBISH and no longer artistic.

Anyway, I digress before I even start.

"Siren", a gold sculpture by Marc Quinn, depicts Kate Moss in a yoga position, and is to be displayed at the British Museum... I... Why don't you just encase a copy of "Hello" in glass, bathe it in light and force us to worship it? Celebrity culture is NOT CULTURE, and it is shockingly tacky for supposed "art" to stoop to celebrity worship.

Am I being snobbish? I don't give a flying melonflipper; this is pathetic, headline grabbing bottom of the barrel and base art. I hate it. I hate it because it's mundane and everyday - even if it is made of gold! To say sculpting Kate Moss lacks imagination is a huge understatement. Brit-art has done mundane to death over the past 20 years. Time to move on, I think.

Anyway, there's a new Ladytron album on the way, which is pretty cool...

So it's not all bad. It's lucky there's a fairly constant stream of good music about, or I'd have to spend my time considering what's going to happen when Britain elects a Conservative - BNP coalition government... Might happen, unless Flash Gordon Brown listens to Larry Elliott and Dan Atkinson's proposals. They might yet save us, Flash!
Of course, people will think controlling the financial world is "radical and dangerous", because they are scared and lack imagination (again!), but it's really not such a radical idea - it's the current system which is radical. Dangerously so, for everyone who isn't a high flying banker. Not that I'm thinking about that, anyway.

New Wearable Feedbags Let Americans Eat More, Move Less

scanners

2008-05-26T15:44:00.003+01:00

Sticking to my new brief, I'll tootle around music for a while...
And most importantly will be the forthcoming Flying Lotus album "Los Angeles", which I have been lucky enough to hear. It's fantastic, complex, and sprawling, and works very well as an album - the first few listens it just seems to be a big whole, which is no bad thing!

Some people won't like it at all, I'm sure, but the same can be said of most things.

Differences of opinion constantly surprise me - for example today I read on Drowned in Sound, that their single of the week "with ease" is this, which is horrible, although it does express perfectly the despair I feel at Britain snowballing towards another Conservative government... but I don't like that feeling, and I'd rather have my toes chewed off by rabbits than listen to that feeling musically. ouch.
So, yeah, weird how people can have such different tastes.

Luckily, over on Angryape, we find the new Ratatat video, which is as good a stress buster as you're likely to find....

So, obviously more videos should be made from old Arnie movies!

Later today, I read this article called "agnostic about atheism". I sometimes wonder whether lots of arguements in the world would disappear, if people did their fucking research!
My God, it's irritating, as this is not the first swipe at Richard Dawkins that claims something like, "music in general (..) must be tossed out when you refuse to appreciate religion."
No, as a criticism of Richard Dawkins, this is stupid, as he goes out of is way in his book to appreciate the cultural role of religion in society... it's just that he says it's not necessary now.
In fact, as Bill Hicks pointed out before he died, in modern culture, it's the denial of the good of drug abuse which should invoke the tossing out of all your music... Don't watch that Bill Hicks link if you have a weak constitution, by the way, it is "not for everybody" in a Steppenwolf stylee.

be french

2008-05-19T19:49:00.004+01:00

So it's Eurovision again... in the spirit of research, I have just listened to the UK entry. Well, well done Britain, you have unbelievably bland taste. Embarrassingly so. I mean, don't you want to win? This is neither stupid enough, European enough or bad enough. The Spanish entry is, well, "interesting", and at least endearing in some sense...

But but but, what am I on about? There are some occasions where you stand head and shoulders over the rest of the world just by being French, and this is one of those times. Sebastién Tellier's Divine, despite shockingly being in English, is actually stylish and good. I think this is a Eurovision first.

Nice cover too, as it's definitely still 1973...

Of course he won't win, but on the strength of this song, I'll be voting for a French government in the next UK general election (I'm tired of our parties, anyway). How could being ruled by France be any worse than what we've got (and I am NOT making hints about Scotland)?

shit shop

2008-05-18T17:51:00.004+01:00

I've seen Hot Chip djing twice now, and, my god, they are terrible. I just heard hours of the most monotonous, soulless, dull house music... I don't understand how they could have such bad taste. We're talking the kind of house that just rises and falls, with drum-rolls taking you to the "peaks", in a "hands in the air" style. Awful.
I was tempted to rush the stage and scold them for being so tacky.

At least there's a new(ish) Junior Boys track to calm me down. If that's not the best noise you've ever heard; that's okay, there's nothing wrong with having no taste. People won't mind too much. You can still have some kind of life.

I haven't written anything for a while as the news is too terrible to comment on, and UK politics have become too depressing to bear. Go and have a Conservative government, if you have to; see if I care. I'd like to blame the press, but it's not all their fault!! People are grown up enough to make their own decisions - it seems like they're going to make some bad ones, but they'll have to live with them. It's just a shame the other nice people, who don't turn into rabid right-wing maniacs at the slightest drop in house prices, will have to suffer a Conservative government too. Not to say current incumbent is good, or anything, in fact certainly the popularity of the Right now is partly due to his incompetence and lack of convictions.
...but that doesn't mean one should just vote for "the other lot"! That's dumb.
Bah.

I intend to be lost in music for the foreseeable future instead.

I Lied

2008-05-05T21:33:00.002+01:00

well, if Britain is going to start voting Conservative en-masse again, I don't care about lying.... so here's another link to another song by the lovely James Pants :)

I mean, honestly - Boris Johnson? Are you kidding me? He's a joke, and the ex mayor didn't even do anything wrong that I had noticed (except punish people for driving, which is hardly a crime). So, unless there's a miracle, which there won't be, things are going to go from bad to worse when David Cameron is elected Prime Minister.... people really are stupid enough to vote for him. Damn.

git

2008-04-30T09:59:00.006+01:00

This man is a git. Now, eugenics is definitely unscientific, dangerous rubbish... however, with the "educated classes" it does seem to work. Take this face, for example:
When we examine the mouth, we see it is gelatinous and puffy, especially in the bottom lip area. This signifies pompousness, stubbornness and mental restriction. Without further testing, we can assume, rightly, that this man will be horrible. As it happens, my suspicions can be verified with evidence:
He is a journalist who gave up a source, whom he had misquoted, who under the following stress committed suicide.
He is undertaking a journalistic campaign or misinformation and slander against the left wing mayor of London, while describing himself as "a lefty". Working for a conservative newspaper and getting a conservative candidate elected is not "lefty", it's stupid.

He is stupid - look at his stupid face! Stupid stupid stupid.

...Someone else who's stupid, and talentless, is Annie "I've got a great idea! let's do the photo naked" Liebovitz. And people are stupid too, because they buy into the idea that "naked = art" unquestioningly. What's niggling me today is that there's some scandal about a 15 year old US star who was shot by Liebowitz. Now, surprisingly enough, at some point during the shoot, Annie "I've got a great idea! let's do the photo naked" Liebovitz evidently said, "I've got a great idea! let's do the photo naked", and said photo was printed in some shitty magazine that substitutes substance with celebrity.
Well, to the girl in question, her fans, her parents and the morally outraged everywhere - what did you expect? It's Annie "I've got a great idea! let's do the photo naked" Liebovitz; she only has one idea! Don't let her near children, for Christ's sake!

aesthetic pants

2008-04-28T21:09:00.006+01:00

Go to the Stones Throw (it's a record label) site, and get the half hour "music from the forest" podcast by James Pants.

This is, exactly the musical world I want to live in; more or less the perfect aesthetic. And it's free, so you can listen too, and not understand where I'm coming from at all.
Still it could be worse, you could be listening to the new Madonna album. I'm prepared to go out on a limb, without hearing it, and predict assuredly that it's embarrassingly awful. I don't need to hear it to know it, like I don't need to be at a heavy metal concert to predict black will be worn.

I don't expect to be forcing any more Pants on the world until the album comes out. In May.

The "Karriem Riggins" live dj set on the above site is mas que un poco especial tambien.

google ads give advice

2008-04-26T18:15:00.002+01:00

I was looking at a site called Photoshop Disasters, which is self explanatory, and my eyes wandered across the google ad panel on the right....

I clearly need direction

2008-04-23T22:19:00.004+01:00

Oh, dear. Now Billary Clinton's won in Transylvania, she thinks she can continue, and "go all the way."

How selfish is she? By the time she finally loses to Obama in the summer, John McCain's reputation will have increased just by the fact the Democratic nominees have been dragging each other's through the mud for a year. Why do I care? Because it's important for the world we don't have another Republican administration.

It's also important Billary doesn't win, as she thinks it's reasonable to "obliterate" other countries. Very depressing thought, that. I was wondering if, as she thinks it's ok to kill an entire nation due to the actions of its leader, whether she thinks leader and nation are indeed one and the same thing. How else could you feel justified in saying what she did? I suppose the idea of leader = nation is not exactly new, but it has uniquely been held by leaders who have entirely lost the plot (Mao, Stalin, late term Blair and Thatcher). So to elect someone who is already as deluded as that, I feel would be misguided. America! Listen! Don't be misguided!

..and yesterday was St George's day. What's the point of that again? I'm sorry you will have to explain to me why it's good to be "Praahhd of yer cantry", cause like God, I just don't feel nationalism. Certainly not English nationalism; what on earth could that mean? While I of course think Fish and Chips is better than any French cuisine, and I will get violently defensive about English cheese, that really is due to taste, and not because they're English (I hope)....yeeeeaaees, well, p'raps I'd be happier with all this brainless flag waving if a great deal of the enthusiasm for it didn't come from people who read the Daily Mail (ie in-or-out of the closet racists).

I've been tootling about the "blogosphere"... excuse me while I go and vomit after using that word... and it's increasingly apparent to me I am not doing the done thing of putting tons of ugly self promotion and advertising down my right column. Why aren't I doing this? Because I'm keeping it real, Gangstar style. OF course the whole idea of blogs is arrogance way beyond what's reasonable, but hey, that's no excuse to get too big-headed. Which I'm not - check out how big my header logo isn't :).

rarity

2008-04-22T16:32:00.002+01:00

This link leads to a new song by "James Pants".
It's really good. I mean this in a genuine non-sarcastic way, too. Ever so often I hear a song that from the first note reaffirms my conviction that most music is indeed rubbish, and I'm not wrong to criticise the next big thing for being poo, because it really is; and this particular song serves to highlight exactly how rubbish everything else is.
So, James Pants! My new musical hero!

Award show in news headline scandal

2008-04-21T17:49:00.004+01:00

Today, across Britain, another pointless award show has claimed top story and headline status over a broad spectrum of media.
Asked why this unimportant backslapping turgid waste of everyone's time was considered new by journalists and editors, one said, "because we're a bunch of useless, fawning freeloaders who like (...free)champagne, and we love to be allowed to hang about in the shadows of TV stars because we're essentially worthless human beings."

The essential worthlessness of show-biz journalists, celebrities and award shows was tonight being investigated by Scotland Yard, although they unfortunately seemed to be "really excited" about the prospect of meeting celebrities.
.....

In more normal business, here's an article about the "euston manifesto", by Alan Johnson, who is a sell out git who pretends to be left wing while actually being a warmongering Thatcherite. You wish to know why? The Euston idiots have all become so dim, that like American evangelicals, they can only see things in black and white, which leads them to scary conclusions. Conclusions, which, unsurprisingly, are inhumane, uncaring and unimaginative.
Fuck anyone who considers themselves as "left wing", yet believes in bombing innocent people for the crimes of their leaders, who have given up believing in redistribution, and accepted unswervingly the frankly scary "free market = democracy" mantra. Screw you all, you've all become corrupted by something, I can't imagine what. Perhaps with your London lifestyles your brains are cocaine and champagne rotted, or perhaps you were always fakers in the first place.
The Euston lot are correct that some anti-war protesters were very simple, and I also find lazy anti Americanism unfortunate - but most of it wasn't lazy. It is not lazy or misguided to see the Bush government's use of war and the IMF/World bank as seriously immoral. The "freedom and democracy" drive they undertook was a sham, a sham designed to move a great deal of public money into private hands.... hufff. I know it sounds radical, but that is what happened, and there's almost no evidence of concern for humanity or democracy or any kind of freedom except that of US/EU corporations to buy up foreign assets cheaply.
It's time people exploded the free-market myth for what it is. What it is not is anything to do with democracy or freedom - I am totally convinced of that. "Free markets" allow the financially powerful free reign to become richer, backed up by WTO courts. Democracies that wish to do their own thing actually have to LEAVE the WTO, as it doesn't allow them freedom of economic determination. If you don't privatise, allow home grown industries to be bought by foreign companies, apparently you're acting "against freedom". It's a nonsense.

All of the above people should be made to stand in the corner, or alternatively made to go to their rooms until they're genuinely sorry.
Or possibly taken outside and shot.

pronk

2008-04-17T10:10:00.001+01:00

Congress Debates Merits Of New Catchphrase

sometimes I just don't know

2008-04-16T12:26:00.003+01:00

... I was really looking forward to Jamie Lidell's new album, and now I've heard it.. eyeeeeee... It's a bit old school. His debut was especially cool, mixing crazy electronic tricks with soul vocals - but now the tricks have mostly gone, and while it's not bad, it's not exciting :( Sometimes it reminds me of Justin Timberlicker.

I also heard the new M83 record. I hated the last one, almost violently so, but this one is muuuuch better. However, it exists in a world that starts and finishes in 1986, so if you don't ever think "I want to listen to Tears For Fears", you are unlikely to want to listen to this either. Of course, the rather pleasing flip side of that, is if you are "hip", and you like this record, you are essentially admitting to liking Tears For Fears. Groovy.

Then I heard "Foals". Don't believe the hype - they are a more irritating version of Franz Ferdinand, who have very rudely stolen some of the noises Battles make. They're trying too hard to be cool, a fact that becomes painfully obvious when you see their haircuts and clothes. For the record, that's the first record I've deleted from my i-tunes library, for fear of someone seeing I had it. I couldn't cope with the shame - and if you look carefully through my library you'll find a Slayer song. That bad.

billy idol

2008-04-15T21:10:00.003+01:00

there's more god vs darwin noise aboot, relating to an intelligent design documentary hosted by the boring teacher from Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Anyone, anyone?
I'm gonna watch it, for a laugh, once it's finished downloading in an illegal stylee.
Anyway, there's a lot of blah blah blah back and forth, but the only question ID people seem to reasonably ask is "why are there no answers to "why did the big bang happen/why did life happen."
I think that's a reasonable thing to ask, and luckily for them, I know the answer!
Why? No reason. Why should there be a reason? It's only because the question "why?" has got us so far that we think there's always an answer to it, but there really isn't. Things just happen, and I'm sorry if that makes everything seem a little pointless, but it shouldn't do, one just has to accept that life is only important on a human scale - which is quite important enough. On a cosmic scale we are so tiny and short-lived we are barely worth a mention. I suppose I'm saying we have to get over ourselves on this one. And get on and be nice to each other too. (not including Bono)

In 20 (estimated) mins I get to see the documentary, anyway, and maybe I'll be converted, who knows? Update to follow :)

quality marketing

2008-04-15T09:08:00.003+01:00

In the guardian I learn that a chip producer is using the slogan "east your greens!" to promote chips. This apparently is because they are low fat chips, therefore healthy, and a "green light" food (as opposed to bad food, which would be a red light). Now we all know that "eat your greens" refers to eating green vegrtables, not potatoes, so the company, McCain, will also know it is being very naughty, and it's marketing department should be put in the stocks.
Just in case you're not sure that they are evil, while searching for a picture of the "eat your greens" slogan, I was directed to netmums.com, where I found this:

That's a little small, so let me quote, "And here's a healthy option to serve up with your quality fast food: McCain Rustic oven chips: the "all green" chip."
When we use quotation marks like that, I must point out, we me something is similar to, but not exactly what we say. So; Madonna is an artist, vs, Madonna is an "artist". You know the difference. And between all green and "all green"? Are they taking the piss out of themselves?

Regardless, they know they're full of shit on this one; to claim chips are healthy is like saying war is fun.

another god rant

2008-04-14T19:13:00.005+01:00

I just read this article in the Gruaniad, complaining about Richard Dawkins and his "secular army". Apparently, Dawkins should stop, because "God is behind some of our greatest art".
Well guess what? I don't give a fuck. Absolute monarchies were also behind some of "our greatest art", and I don't hear any fat-heads calling for their return. Mark Ravenhill; you are a plankton.
Get real. If humans took the time to see the world as it is, without fantastical imaginary Gods and so on, they would find something even more amazing, and even more awe-inspiring than the stories we used to make up.
The creation story, for example, is absolutely mind-numbingly dull compared to current scientific explanations of the birth of the universe. That is some mind-bending crazy stuff there, and it really puts things in perspective. Also, genetic mutation and natural selection is a much more beautiful "story" than the idiotic one in the Bible. So don't tell me science, or the real world, can't be inspirational; that only proves you are too lazy to read and understand some (fairly basic) science (it's more comfortable, I understand, to stay wrapped up in your childish stories).

So bugger off.... Where is this "secular army", anyway? I don't see secularists burning churches and killing non-secularists anwhere - that appears to be religiously inspired people doing that stuff. To say that being a secularist means you have to be ignorant of the bible, or "great Christian art" is so idiotic, I think Mr Ravenhill might have taken an stupid-pill. And just because Europe was a Christian culture, doesn't mean it has to continue to be. I seem to remember Christianity has taken many pre-Christian European traditions and holidays, so who's to say we shouldn't ignore the Bible and look to Pagans, or just say "things change"? We can accept and learn about and respect Christianity while superseding it, why not?
But what really pisses me off, is that if this neckless fat-face excuse for an artist had READ DAWKINS he would have noticed there is a great deal of respect and admiration given for Christian culture. Noone is saying we must burn the bible and all traces of Christian culture must be erased, not at all. I am saying, however, that belief in god is a bit thick, and it's only sentimentalism and a failure to accept we are not the centre of he universe (an ego thing). But once you get past that, the world is a much more wonderful place, albeit one blighted by pea-brained unevolved dimwits like Mark Ravenhill.

Here's one I missed earlier by Charlie Brooker, about the "Brain Gym", which is a nice idea wrapped in utter nonsense - I agree totally with what he says.

“I want to do Movies, actually that’s why I’m moving to Hollywood, I also want to meet Tom Cruise.”

2008-04-13T22:52:00.006+01:00

nothing interesting going on... so what better to while away the time than reading blogs on the internet? You might have noticed I put a link to "Bai Ling's crazy blog", on the left - it's pretty (unintentionally) funny. Through that I found something even betterrer, which is this.
Less "inspiring", is news that ageing rockers Radiohead have, in a sooo zeitgeist-y way, launched their own social networking site. Sounds like a barrel of laughs, that place: "Are you pretentious, depressed and boring,? Me too!"
...so far I am resisting any temptations of signing up, infiltrating and going undercover (or being abusive..).

Temple of Lords

2008-04-01T15:09:00.006+01:00

The Lords Economic Affairs Committee have released their report on the effects of immigration in the UK. I am tempted not to write at all, because I'm so angry I can barely keep my fingers on the keyboard, and I'm worried that the coffee I want to drink will raise my blood pressure to such a point that I actually explode.
I want to do a point by point dissection of why the authors are a complete bunch of mentally limited backwards little-Englander WANKERS who make me wish I was wrong about God altogether, so these snobby over privileged FUCKS actually spend the eternity of their hopefully quite soon deaths in hell, (I'm quite agitated), but I can't because the response to the report has been so depressing.

Did people respond to the last report in the UK, that said immigration was a good thing for the economy, by saying,
"Oh, my prejudices seem to have blinded me to the truth, and now I see the facts, I think foreigners are lovely"?
No, they said nothing, but NOW, with this Lord-upon-high report backing up his brainlessness, we have man on street (via internet) spouting such enlightened vomit as,
"They show unequivocally that the benefits of the current immigration policy to ordinary UK citizens are largely non-existent."
Oh sorry, that wasn't "man on street", that was David "pointless" Davis of the Conservative(read 'reactionary liberal-economic racist') party. The grey haired shit. Let's responsibly whip up a load of public xenophobia so we can win the next election shall we David, you gitflap?

Man on street he say, (all from the BBC's "have your say page", link can go fuck itself)
"..every decent person wants some diversity but not a take over ,when you board a London underground train and you are the only white face in a half full carriage and police are patrolling your town warning of East European pick pockets you know immigration has gone too far even immigrants are saying it."

"Send them all back home we are just an island ourselves and we are too full now, deport them all." (sorry, that was a woman, Tina - with an opinion! Whatever next!? Deport them all I say.)

"To be honest, I'm surprised anyone wants to come to live in a nation full of Xenophobic Neanderthals." Ok, that one's for balance, though I did have to correct the spelling and punctuation.

"I have moved from Poland 2 years ago, I from Belarus which is not a part of EU. I have always dreamed to live in the UK. Seriously I can understand immigrants from Eastern Europe, but what is really makes on my nerves is Polish, Czesh and Slovakian chavs, non skilled workers in hoodies who will never understand that they should respect UK and UK's laws. There are makes really bad opinion for the rest. There is in the UK to many domestic chavs already." That's beyond parody, Denis from Cardiff - you should have your own Chat Sh..

..ow

Evangelicals are Stupid/a ramble

2008-03-30T14:50:00.005+01:00

Well, they are, ok? I've been watching the documentary "Jesus Camp", about a kids summer camp that's designed to turn innocent little Amrrc'ns into soldiers. Soldiers for Jesus, yeah. It is a bit scary really, so it's lucky it's set in the States, which is a long way away; I mean I don't feel directly threatened by it (or empathise with it). Long distance is cool like that.
Anyway, them being stupid 'n all: I used to assume Evangelical Christians were just another branch of Christianity, but seeing them in action; they're just not! It's really not Christianity.. now I assume any readers will know I'm not into God - I don't like the term Atheist although that's essentially where I stand.
Anyway, why is it not Christianity, this Evangelical brand? It's because for them, Christianity is two things - God speaking to you, and non-believers being the enemy.
They prattle on like lunatics about Jesus Is My Lord, and Let Jesus Into all kinds of places, but they don't appear to have soaked up his most basic messages.
Because I have to admit Jesus had some good ideas - we just part ways when it comes to God. And if I had to choose, I think Kant was a better thinker, though not as good a communicator (seriously, try reading Kant; it's insanely difficult).
Most importantly for Jesus was stuff like "Love thy neighbour"; Evangelicals are rubbish at that, in fact they seem to have no time for empathy or understanding at all. So, that's what I mean about not being Christian.

worshipping false idols etc

And brainwashing kids, jesus, it's unbelievable. They're put in an environment with an overload of visual and aural stimulus, in big groups with everyone shouting, and occasionally speaking in tongues... It is not surprising you see many children in this film totally overcome with emotion. It's too much for them to handle. It's not fair. It is also remarkably similar to modern "non-violent" torture methods, designed to disorient captives and leave them more open to suggestion. Very Christian Stuff.

It's this film where you also get to meet a pre-scandal Ted "male prostitute/drug using" Haggard explaining how Church is popular with kids because unlike public school, which tries to tell them they're animals, Church tells kids they're God's creation and very special. Awww.

I'm just finishing Naomi Klein's "The Shock Doctrine", which I would urge anyone to read; it's an important book.

When I get tense and angry, to relax I either like to watch fat people falling over, or failing that, Skateboarding, so here's some of that:

NOlyimpics

2008-03-25T17:12:00.003+01:00

This Tibet-China-boycott Olympics thing.. hufff. So Shorty Sarkozy has finally done something good by saying he won't rule out a boycott of the opening ceremony, because of Tibet. (ok, that's actually not ruling out doing something good, but hey)
Now, I thought the Olympics were supposed to be about generally good ideals, combined with "who is the best at a pointless activity?". So I was heartened to hear that Olympics chief Jacques Rogge was heartened "that no major government had backed a boycott".

I mean, what is he? Some sort of c±nt? Is there perhaps too much sponsorship and such tied into the Moneylympics these days, that any political complaints might cost too much? Come on, it's not as if China is oppressing anyone, is it? What possible reason would anyone have to boycott an event organised by a non-democratic country that stifles freedoms?

Of course, Coke and McDonald's, and other suitably sporty commercial giants don't want to be associated with anything like that, so it's a shame these fucking Buddhists have to start pointing out unfortunate truths about China. Shhhhhh! Shut up, watch telly, enjoy the sport, drink Coke and fuck all the oppressed people in China! Ignore that nagging at your conscience! Couple of Big Macs and 15 hours of continuous live TV coverage, and your conscience will have been beaten into submission anyway(along with most of your intelligence) - ignore it!

I'm sure someone out there will be able to explain how "engaging" with China and letting the Olympic propaganda run out without a hitch will somehow help China to change. I remember in the 80s that was exactly what we did with South Africa - we engaged with it, traded with it, convened sporting event... Oh wait a minute, we did the opposite! Doh! That's right, trading with someone is no way to encourage change! oops!
You know, I think our business leaders might be lying to us about their involvement with China, unless they are honest enough to admit they don't give a shit about anything but the bottom line (few are, except that bastard Ryan Air owner).

Blah blah blah.

niñofixo is a tonto

2008-03-24T14:30:00.003+01:00

Seems the kids have entirely got down with the horrid 80s cheese they are too young to hate with a passion. So now things like "voyage voyage" are kind of hip. Last night I saw for the first time a group of (more or less) grown up people who look like a completely different generation.
Or possibly what I actually saw was one room full of wannabees and fashion victims, with no taste at all.

In fact, looking back through my slightly foggy memory, the second theory is more likely - as after half an hour of 80s tack, for no apparent reason, the pre-pubescent dj-boy-thing (niñofixo, I think), played Chumbawumba. That song about alcohol. The fashion victims were going wild, apparently oblivious to the dirge they were being served. I think you could´ve played anything to these monkeys, and as long as, as the dj, your haircut was angular enough, they would have taken it to be cool.

So, I write them off. I was only in this place waiting for a concert by Australian group "The Midnight Juggernauts", who were, I can report, very amateurish. So, totally worth waiting for till 3.30am when they´d finally got their straggly selves out of above bar and onto the stage. Perhaps they got really good during their last 30 mins, but it wasn´t looking hopeful, so I don´t know, as I spent that time speeding bedwards in a taxi.

evasive thinking

2008-03-22T14:06:00.003+01:00

Over in Drowned in Sound (link right) they have an "exclusive preview" of Portishead's third album "third". Now they flew all the way to Berlin, and were given the album to listen to on special "personlised i-pod's", during the flight.
I expect the i-pod was programmed to explode after one listen, too, to keep everything under wraps prior to the album's release next month.

So who put it on the internet a couple of weeks ago? Why didn't "drowned in sound" save the environment by sitting their bottoms in their offices and downloading it, instead of hauling themselves on a secret mission to get a free trip to Berlin.
Now, I downloaded it, and I will buy it when it's released (as I like it). But I'm not principled enough to wait two months to hear something when I can hear it today. I'm also not snobby enough to pretend I have to fly to Berlin to hear something, when I don't.
If Portishead wanted to keep their album secret, they shouldn't have given it to obviously disloyal people who put it on the web. And since that happened, they needn't have continued with the charade that journalists (who love free stuff) be brought to "preview" the record like some freeloading James Bonds.

ricky martin

2008-03-20T18:54:00.002+01:00

Coldplay have released new album details.
I can exclusively reveal to you that they are:

a:it will kill what remains of any soul you may have, and

b:you will all buy it like sheep *evil laugh*.

Some people will say "nay, Brian Eno's producing it, it will be a masterwork."

Brian Eno did some amazing things - around 1981. None of the wonder of Talking Heads will be rubbing off here, believe me. In fact, "Brian Eno producing" smacks to me of a band wildly scraping around for the credibility they will never get, but I'm horrible.

dirty black summer

2008-03-20T00:25:00.002+01:00

from the gruaniad: Clinton a long way from the White House at key foreign policy moments.

erm. She was the FUCKING FIRST LADY, NOT THE PRESIDENT. Has the world turned into Paris Hilton's brain? fuck me.

(incilaydentaly, the title of this post refers to a unfashionable song I'm listening to at the moment, not anything else.)

(and I'll spell incidentally any goddamn way I please, ok?)

sucker

2008-03-19T13:12:00.002+01:00

Apparently Barack Obama gave a speech addressing race today in America, and apparently it was very important and timely. Apparently I watched most of it, but I can't maintain concentration on him for more than half a sentence for some reason, I just drift off.
The same thing happens if I hear Kennedy speeches, or Martin Luther King. It's as if the tempo of worthy speech is a sedative.
Anyway, I ....... didn't come here today (applause)... to c...... riticise... worthy speech makers.

......Whatever their creed.

(applause)

America.

(applause)

I came here today

(reconvene in 6 months)

...to point out how Mr Obama,

... laudable as it was,

.......gave an honest and unflinching dissection...

of race in America today.

It would be a lovely change if a politician was successful due to his/her honesty and unflinching dissections. I have never experienced that in my life, and I'm not convinced that "the people" like hearing the truth from politicians. I hope I'm wrong, and that in the future, worthy speeches can have more gusto and less pausing for effect.

Shit Therapy

2008-03-18T16:03:00.003+01:00

The US economy is suffering a "downturn", the government there has finally admitted.
But the wonders of US economic bullshit never ceases. It's purported to be the best, most logical, self-regulating scientific system humanity has ever known*, and yet we have US Treasury Secretary Hank Paulson saying he didn't believe investors saw the rescue of Bear Stearn as a bail-out.
So investors are idiots I take it? They must be.

I've been reading "Shock Therapy" by Naomi Klein, it's very good, and convincing; Free markets have nothing to do with free peoples, in essence. In fact in practice, free markets work best without free people. Repression and poverty seem to be the order of the day. Certainly not the best thing for all people, which is what one is supposed to believe, if one listens to the free market gurus.

This is Free Market economics: It's a fantastical, fascistic theory built on a massively stupid understanding of people and society. It has nothing to do with democracy, and everything to do with making capital easier to extract. Want to know why the divide between rich and poor has increased even while overall wealth has increased enourmously? Free Market policies; the "Washiton Consensus".

*as noted mental economist Milton Friedman would have said. Probably while proposing systems that would increase poverty, encourage torture and political repression across Latin America. An Evil, terrible, now thankfully dead, man. Were he not already dead, I've have him taken out and shot, but we'll have to make do instead with Jeffrey Sachs, if anyone knows where to find him. He was present at most of the economic daylight robbery events of the past 20 years, so search for the next one, there he'll be.

the blend

2008-03-18T09:38:00.003+01:00

"This is our remix for Goldfrapp's song 'Happiness'. Unfortunately for us, it didn't get approved, but we still really like this song so we did some cooking to celebrate. Happiness is a severed hand!" say remixers Rex the Dog... well, it was all going fine till that keyboard solo after the chorus :S

nice video, mind you.

to the idiot commenting below (well, not the one who is me, obviously); no this is not a likeable blog, thankyou; now bugger off.

Man, Firefox is undermining my confidence. The ONE THING I have always been complurtely perfect with is spelling, and due to the American dictionary that works with Firefox automatically, I keep getting called up on my Britisher English. Like likeable. Screw you Firefox! LABOUR COLOUR WANKER. Put that in your spell checker and smoke it you gits. JODER. Even "gits" is not a word apparently. But, "Britisher" is! Bomb America for crimes against language.

dinner

2008-03-16T20:34:00.004+01:00

Anyone rightly unimpressed with the latest Hot Chip album, where the foursome squander most of their lo-fi charm and spend too much cash on production values, you should check out anything by ex-member "Grovesnor". In fact an upcoming single has been remixed by Hot Chip, you can stream it here, and it's quite nice in a Miami Vice kind of way.

However, not everyone wants to live in the 80s, in which case the new Ninja Cuts "you don't know" compilation should suffice. 50 highly varied tracks of music with its head firmly in the future, like Zero DBs fantastic remix of Bonobo, which I'm not mentioning at all just because I met the wife of one of them, 'cause that would be pathetic. Personal highlight is a track called "poison dart" by The Bug....

Del the Funky Homosapian has a new album out too, which is cool - a hiphop record not featuring the mobile-phone-friendly production of Kanye West for once. God I hate him. Anyway, "11th Hour" is the name of the album, and it's pretty back to basics; very refreshing.

I've heard the new Portishead album too, which is pleasantly oblique. I don't think it's quite oblique enough to put off the coffee-table set, but my ears are not easily offended (in one way) so I might be wrong....

Obviously my ears are very easily offended by music I don't like; most music. For example, I don't like pop music, and I don't like rock music when it sounds the same as a hundred other rock bands. The dreadful predictability of "the next big thing" turning out to be four boys rattling about with guitars again is mildly depressing, to put it lightly. What's the point of that? I don't like Trance, or jangly arched-eyebrow indie music (that's you, los crapesinos; you're not intelligent, you're boring). I'm not a big fan of singer song-writers, mostly because I have no empathy for whatever they're moaning on about - oh, you're sad about something, yeah? Boo-hoo. What sort of person tries to profit from their own misery? A git, I've been told.
I could also do without any band who wants to save the world, too. Politics and philosophy are best served by books, not language forced into rhyming couplets, with pompous noise in the background.

And breath out.

Oh, I read elsewhere you can get the new single by Daedelus, "Hrs, mins, secs" free, as a pre-album teaser. It's wild and crazy.

Advertising, religion: rubbish

2008-03-12T12:10:00.003+01:00

A very nobby advert has been banned in the UK for causing "serious offense" to Christians. Apparently there were complaints: Twenty Three! (someone call Jim Carrey).
Well, there are at least 23 pointless excuses for adults in Britain then.
There should be offense laws in Britain. They should be:
"It is not illegal for someone to offend you, you're adults, get over yourselves."

If the hair advert was saying "I hope my lovely curls obliterate the scum that are Christians", then that would be incitement of some sort, and I would not agree with it. But using religious imagery isn't wrong. It may be crappy, especially in relation to hair products, but there's no law against being crappy.

The advert can be seen here. Prepare to be offended.

Last week it was the eighties, now we go back a little more to NYC disco, from "Hercules and Love Affair", which is like disco but with pretentiousness.
It's good, though.

what it means

2008-03-11T08:25:00.002+01:00

... to be British.

The BBC reports government proposals to get school students to swear an oath of allegiance to the Queen. Amusingly, that is part of their "citizenship" plan - rather than that subject-hood plan.
Anyway, what is this? Since when was that necessary? Britain isn't the US; it doesn't need overt patriotism to survive, and certainly not rubbish like swearing an oath of allegiance to the Queen.

Swearing at the Queen, perhaps..

All of this hand wringing about Britishness and Englishness is toss, frankly. It's middle England getting scared by change, and frothed up by the idiot Daily Mail, Express and Telegraph. I am convinced that most social problems (which most middle-englanders will never see) would disappear, if we worked on increasing real material equality. Ha! As if.

At the moment though, the debate seems to be framed by this kind of nonsense, and the laughable BBC "white" season, which is addressing the terrible problems white people have in Britain today. Did I say terrible problems white people have? Sorry, I must have become temporarily stupid. Like BBC2, I imagine.

It's achingly clear there's a big political problem in Britain: there is no progressive party. And don't say "the Lib Dems"; they have shown themselves to be a bunch of jobsworths just as much as Labour. Screw them.

Still, why should I care or anyone listen? I live in Spain, where we have a genuinely progressive, positive, forward looking leader, who's just won an election where the main issue was immigration. Immigration here makes UK immigration look like a joke, by the way, and Zapatero just won the election saying immigration was a good thing. Incredible. Faced with the usual right-wing scaremongering about immigration, he attacked back, instead of making awful concessions to dimwitted little-englanders and racists, like the Labour party seem to do in Britain.

zoot neon

2008-03-07T19:06:00.002+01:00

this is quite good:

as is this:

It's an 80s style pop extravaganza!

edit 3. I've just downloaded what is apparently a Fabric-rejected mix by Justice, who I like a lot. I found it following links here, and it's worth visiting just to read the comments below it; an excellent example of crazy-internet-anger. It's like a music version of the daily mail website... the mix is pretty cool, though.